Jottings from the Mountain

My blog has moved!

2009-02-15T23:58:00.003-05:00

My apologies if you have been looking for me or my posts here.

I guess my Blogger blog feels like an abandoned puppy, but I never meant it that way!

Anyway, some months ago I moved my blog so I can host it myself instead of relying on Blogger. To read any further posts by me, go to:

http://www.honeylocustpress.com/serendipity/

No time to read the guidelines?

2008-06-22T12:03:00.004-04:00

As the editor of an ezine that publishes crime fiction, as well as the owner of a small-press publishing company, I'm constantly getting queries and submissions from people who would like to have their story or book published.

Of course, I WANT submissions! I'm a publisher, after all. There have been a couple of occasions when submissions were thin on the ground, and I despaired of having enough stories for an issue of the ezine.

But recently I received an email submission for the ezine from someone and I was puzzled. The email had two flash pieces in it, both in a single attached document. The writer had not included in the email:

a cover note of any kind
the author's name
the titles of the story
any prior publishing credits
any idea of what the stories were about
an indication of which issue the stories were for (as each issue is themed, I need to know this as it is not always obvious and it helps me to read with an eye toward the theme)

ALL those things are stated clearly in the Submission Guidelines, as being required for a submission. I read the stories anyway, as they were flash and therefore short. They had absolutely no relevance to my ezine at all, much less to any theme.

So, I wrote back to the individual about the stories. In my email, I asked if the writer had read the guidelines as to how to submit and what was required in the submission. I also had the temerity to ask him if he had even read one issue of the ezine, to see what the contents are like.

Here is his unedited response:

"Thanks for looking Tony, this is my first adventure into the world of flash fiction and such and I'm getting battered around a bit. It seems editors in fiction are a different breed. I run 4 publisher sites so I know some of what you go through. But working full time self employed, writing, publishing others doesn't allow for a word to word reading of all guidelines-if I did-I'd go broke since seldom do writers get paid."

Now, this individual claims to run four "publisher sites." What that means, I'm not sure, unless he has some sort of business where he publishes work for others, apparently non-fiction since we fiction editors "are a different breed." I wrote non-fiction for years, and you know, non-fiction editors want you to follow the guidelines, too. In fact, most are notably pickier than fiction editors!

But he doesn't want to read the guidelines and submit according to them. If he didn't have time to read the guidelines, I can almost guarantee that he didn't read any of the sample copies that are available. Of course, without reading the guidelines, his statement about writers seldom getting paid is sort of a self-fulfilling prophecy, isn't it? I mean, if you submit and don't follow the guidelines, you probably won't get accepted and therefore won't get paid.

What makes people think that they can throw work out there into the world of editors, willy-nilly and without paying attention to guidelines, and survive as a writer? Sure, someone will accept the work on occasion, but isn't it much more intelligent and efficient to target things appropriately? Sure, you can cast your bread upon the waters. But you better be willing to waste a lot of loaves if you do it that way.

Honestly, it just seems stupid to do things the way this person did. If you disagree, please let me know! I'd love to hear about it.

Paying to Be (not See) the Show

2008-06-11T01:28:00.005-04:00

On an online discussion group I frequent, there has been some discussion about the relative value (to authors) of attending conferences and conventions. I like them, and I attend them when I can, but the cost of transportation,and the rising cost of attendance at such events has greatly curtailed my attendance for the near future.

One person in the group, who is both an author and a minister, said he was disturbed by the idea of being invited to be a presenter or on a panel at such a gathering, and then being told, "Oh, by the way, you have to pay registration just like everyone else." He compared it to being a visiting or stand-in minister at another church, and not being reimbursed for his expenses, or perhaps even being asked to pay to be there.

In my mind, it's a reasonable statement and I hear you, Reverend!

I was invited to moderate a panel at a particular crime fiction con last year and was excited about it even though it was going to cost me airfare, hotel and incidentals. I was discussing this with someone else who had attended, and presented, at that conference before, and she asked me about my registration fee. I was surprised, as I thought, as a part of the "attractions" as it were, I wouldn't need to pay a registration fee. SURPRISE! I was wrong.

I opted not to moderate that panel nor to attend the con. The registration would have added about $150 to my cost of attendance, but that was not really the point. In large part it was the idea that I had not been told up front that I had to pay registration, even though I was going to be a presenter. The person to whom I spoke at the con (the organizer) was surprised at my reaction, as though that was the way it is all over.

It's NOT that way all over, and it shouldn't be that way at any con that is well established. Sure, I understand small cons can't afford to pay the expenses of their presenters or panelists, nor sometimes even their registration fees. (Though why this should be a problem, I'm not sure. A registration fee at a small con usually doesn't purchase any tangibles, so there is no loss as far as I can see.) But large cons such as BoucherCon or LCC are large enough, and cost enough, that they should be able to pay their presenters' registration fees, if not also an honorarium of some sort. If they can't, maybe they should reexamine whether or not they are popular enough to even continue.

Yes, go ahead and splutter your outrage. It's alright with me. It's amazing how often I hear the phrase, "The money must always flow TO the writer," as though it were directly from some sacred tome, yet these cons (who usually disdainfully sneer at authors who stoop to self- or subsidy publish because of the direction of cash flow), don't see it that way when the money is flowing FROM them and TO the writers who are part of the attraction of the con in the first place.

I mean, think about it: if it's a fan convention, the reason the fans are there is to meet, hear, schmooze with and otherwise interact with authors. If there were no authors present, there would be no fans attending.

If it's a writer's conference, the attendees are there to learn something FROM the authors, editors and agents who are there presenting and on panels. Again, if those presenters weren't there, the attendees would not swarm the place simply because it's being held in a nice hotel.

In either case, the attraction is primarily because of the presenters. Why, then, should they have to pay for the privilege of attracting attendees to pay to hear and meet them? I'm really puzzled by the economics of this!

I haven't seen any sort of event where, with a substantial audience, the entertainers pay to be part of the show (well, unless they have a chance at winning a sizable jackpot, as in a rodeo!)

Someone objected to my statements by saying that "No cons of any kind pay registration fees or expenses for presenters!"

I beg to differ—in the last couple of years I have presented at seven different cons. Three were for fans, and in no case did I have to pay a registration fee. Instead, I received free registration and free meals during my attendance. I had to pay my own transportation costs, but at least part of the cost was covered.

Four of them were cons for writers, and at two (within driving distance) I had my parking fees reimbursed and did not have to pay registration. The other two paid my registration, provided me with a nice hotel room and meals and paid a nice stipend to pay for transportation and incidentals.

So, I KNOW it happens. And it's funny that it doesn't happen with mystery cons, because when I was in a different line of work (computer software) I attended cons quite often, both as an ordinary attendee and as a speaker/presenter. NEVER when I was a presenter or speaker did I have to pay my registration fee, and most of the time I had my transportation covered. I certainly don't expect all this generosity from every writing con (for writers or fans) but I don't expect the other extreme, either.

What do you think? Is the laborer worthy of his (or her) hire?

The Ethics and Morality of Writing About Evil

2008-05-18T01:42:00.006-04:00

On another list to which I belong, we have been having a rather heated debate about the way some crime fiction has evolved over the last few years. One person, Sandra Parshall, noted that she felt that fiction she identified as "torture porn" had taken over a segment of the crime fiction genre. There were some people who agreed with her, and some who vigorously denied this statement.

But the discussion

went from there to the idea of censorship,

and then to the desirability of writing sympathetically about evil characters, so they come across as evil good guys. One of the examples that was batted back and forth was the book about the character Dexter, as in Darkly Dreaming Dexter.

My take on it? I am not for censorship, within reason. I believe that the market will naturally select those books that are written about things people want to read about, and the others will fall by the wayside.

HOWEVER... just because one has the legal right to write about something, doesn't mean it's a good thing to do so. Let's explore that.

If you don't know who Dexter is, here's a capsule summary: Dexter is a sociopathic individual, a vivisectionist whose father was a policeman. His father, recognizing his son's tendencies, guided him into a position where his natural proclivities about blood could be of use (as a blood spatter tech in a crime lab). Dexter also, however, sees that a lot of bad guys get off on technicalities and walk, so he carefully stalks these people and kills them by dissecting them... while they are alive.

Now, granted, we want Justice to be done. And we also know that the Law and Justice are sometimes diametrically opposed. But is it good for a character in a book or television show to be portrayed sympathetically when he (or she) is patently Doing Evil in the pursuit of Doing Good? And to take it further, is it a good thing to portray torture graphically in a book or show, simply because that torture is supposed to balance the scales of justice?

Why is the torture, maiming and killing of people for the pleasure of an individual considered to be worth writing about with a positive slant? And make no mistake—Dexter enjoys his work. He rhapsodizes, for example, over finding a severed arm at a murder site, where there is not one trace of blood. You can almost see him drooling, panting with jealousy and admiration for the criminal's ability to work so cleanly.

Let me ask you this: what if, instead of a sociopathic vivisectionist, this person were a violently rabid racist who hates Jews? Would we still paint him so sympathetically when he hunts down a Jewish criminal who happened to slip through the net of the law, and tortures him or her to death? Or suppose he were homophobic instead of a racist... could we empathize with him then?

The point I'm trying to make is, we have drawn some sort of imaginary and arbitrary line that says "This heinous behavior is acceptable, even admirable," but I doubt we would accept it if that same character crossed the PC (political correctness) boundary.

I was a drug and alcohol counselor for a while, and I know how cocaine acts on the brain. It pushed the user up to a new level of high by creating artificial levels of endorphins. But the problem is, when the user comes down from that high, their normal endorphin threshold has been raised and what was a high before is now closer to normal. It takes more endorphins to cross that line into actual enjoyment, for the user to feel "normal" so the user takes more cocaine the next time, and the cycle repeats. After a while, the usual levels of endorphins created by something like a beautiful sunset, or even sex, don't cut it any more.

I have a feeling it's becoming that way for many people with violence, torture and terror in literature. Readers have become so accustomed to these things by constantly increasing levels of exposure, that it takes more and more to raise even a normal level of adrenaline and horripilation... just like the cocaine addict.

For my part, I feel like it's socially immoral and irresponsible to contribute to that problem. I am not asking for censorship by any central authority. But it would be good to see more responsible writing instead of pandering to the baser instincts, and more talented writing instead of titillation.

What do you think?

Amazon and ethics

2008-04-13T12:13:00.004-04:00

Well, if you are a writer, a publisher or just someone who keeps up with the news in the bookselling world, you know about all the brouhaha that has arisen about Amazon's decision to put the thumbscrews to publishers who use POD (print-on-demand) technology.

To use a well-worn expression, a lot of people are up in arms. People are shouting, "Monopoly! Restraint of trade!" and marching around Amazon blowing trumpets, waiting for the walls to fall down. Sad to say, I don't think it's going to happen.

I'm not a lawyer, and I don't play one on TV, although I have played a judge on the stage. But to me, there is no evidence that Amazon has created a monopoly--after all, there still are other online booksellers such as Barnes and Noble or Powell's. And as to restraint of trade--well, they don't say you can't sell on Amazon, but rather that you must follow their particular rules in order to have the most-desired selling method. Even if you don't follow those rules, your books will still appear if carried by third-party sellers. It all appears to this non-lawyer that what they are doing is perfectly legal.

Moral? Ethical?

The problem is, many things that are absolutely, 100% legal are immoral or unethical. For example, it's legal to arrest a handicapped woman who parks in a handicapped space, with a handicapped sticker on her car... because it's a RESERVED handicapped space. Or as a security guard in a Target store, you can legally be fired because you quietly and without fuss stop a minor from stealing liquor from the store.

That being said, Amazon has a legal right to run it's business as it sees fit, within reason. It's the same as with Microsoft (who, we all know, has fought their own battles regarding market share and unfair practices.) Of course, now I own two Macs instead of two Windows machines, and get along just fine, thanks!

I am not a pundit of the publishing industry. But to me, there's something inherently wrong in using your muscle to squeeze more money out of companies and individuals, just because you can. It's not about business--it's about what is right, and what is wrong.

Just be honest, Mr. Bezos: it's all about the money and the control. This way, you can either make money twice on a book if it's printed through BookSurge (once for printing and once for selling it), or you can force publishers to kowtow to you and give you a bigger discount than the brick-and-mortar stores will get, so you can undersell them and put more of them out of business.

My father, a man I greatly respect and admire, said to me once, "I'd rather an honest thief held a gun to my head and took my wallet, than someone steal from me by manipulating the rules. At least then it's all out in the open."

Like I said, it's probably legal. The decision on that has yet to be made. My opinion? It's unethical, and bad business in the long run. But what do I know?

Rain again

2008-04-12T11:52:00.005-04:00

The last time I posted, I talked about rain. I also talked about how we (or rather our goats) were expecting a kid. Well, it has been raining again, and we also have that kid now!

Sadie was born on February 29, 2008. (It rained that day here, too.) Here's a picture of her not long after she was born.

She's growing quickly and is about three times that size now.

It rained last night, too, and stormed pretty heavily. But that didn't stop people from coming out to see, hear and meet the delightful Susan Gregg Gilmore, author of LOOKING FOR SALVATION AT THE DAIRY QUEEN. Susan and her husband were guests at the Harris Arts Center in nearby Calhoun, GA. Susan told us all about her journey to being an author, and how LOOKING FOR SALVATION came to be born. She also gave a brief reading, answered questions and signed copies of her book for her fans. I bought a copy and although I haven't had time to dig too deeply in, I'm charmed by what I've read thus far.

Here is a picture of Susan with Gray Bridges, the Program Coordinator at the Harris Arts Center. (Gray is the one wearing glasses.)

Rain, Rain...

2008-02-06T11:22:00.000-05:00

Yeah, I know, I know... it's been a while.

It's raining here as I type. In fact, after last year's drought, this has been an amazingly damp winter. I'm not complaining, mind! I'm glad of it. Last year's drought contributed to the burnout of our well pump and therefore to the unplanned expenditure of a couple thousand bucks. But I digress.

Actually, I like rain. Rain somehow seems to make me more creative. As I sit and listen to the rain falling on the roof, beating on the window, and pattering on the deck, it relaxes me. And it changes enough not to become really monotonous--like a constantly varying source of white noise.

While I sat here this morning, I've gotten three new ideas for stories and made a few notes on each one. I've worked on a video teaser for a client. And, I haven't had to beat my Muse with a club to make it happen. (Good thing, too, because sometimes she takes it away from me and returns the favor.)

On the home agricultural front, our Boer doe, Hazel, is quite pregnant. It seems Teddy, the buck, managed to convince her of his good intentions and, well, the natural thing occurred. We're expecting her to deliver her kid(s) in late February or early March. It's a very cool thing, and I'm only hoping that Lara will not be at work when it happens. After all, she's the nurse, I'm not. But if I'm here on my own, I'll do the best I can. We have a "kidding kit" all prepared and in a safe, easily accessible place.

Yes, I do talk about the mundane, non-writerly things here. But you see, it's the mundane parts of life that give ideas for stories. The truth is, if a novel only includes the exciting bits of a protagonist's life, I find it boring. Give me some of his or her day-to-day events. Tell me what he had for breakfast before going out and getting shot at. Tell me the name of her hairdresser and beauty salon, the one she's walking out of as she witnesses a hit-and-run accident. Make the life of the character real, so I can connect better with him or her.

Maybe that's why I have a hard time connecting with so many of the shows on TV lately. I simply can't imagine being that person... I can't put myself into his or her shoes, perhaps because I have no idea what sort of shoes he or she actually wears.

Make some small helpings of real life part of the meal that is your book. It will make it all the more appetizing for the reader.

Another market sadly passes...

2007-11-08T12:14:00.000-05:00

I know it's been a while since I've posted here. I've been focused on a couple of projects, as well as posting a lot on my OTHER blog, Pressed for Answers.

But I wanted to address the recent demise of a paying market, Great Mystery and Suspense. An email announcing the end of publication of GM&S magazine was recently sent out by its publisher, Vicki Lipira. I've spoken with Vicki several times about her magazine, and in fact have had two stories published in her quarterly, small-format mag.

Vicki and her husband, Mike, had a dream of a print magazine for mystery and suspense fiction, but with a difference: "wholesome" stories, with no overt sex, no bad language, no unnecessary blood and gore. It's an unusual way of looking at stories which may contain murder, violence, theft, drugs and other things normally considered to be unwholesome. But I understood, as I have tried to establish similar standards for my own online 'zine, Crime and Suspense.

The authors published in the pages of GM&S were a diverse lot: myself, B J Bourg, Barry Baldwin, Patricia Terrell, Simon Wood, Stephen D. Rogers, Tom Purcell, and many others. She also ran non-fiction articles such as an interview with Carol Higgins Clark by Charlotte Adelsperger, and the occasional poem. In short, even though she published many authors whose names may be new or unknown to you, Vicki also published many better-known and very experienced authors. The stories ran the gamut from traditional and PI mysteries to cozies to supernatural/crime crossover stories. You could always find something to enjoy in an issue of Great Mystery and Suspense.

But having a dream doesn't always mean it will come true. Reality intrudes, sometimes all too harshly. Vicki and her husband, Mike, were more than generous when paying authors for their work. Authors were paid $50 for longer pieces, $25 for shorter ones. The zine was 64 pages plus a cover, so that meant 11 or 12 pieces per issue, probably averaging around $475 paid out to authors, per issue.

They were generous to others, too. GM&S ran public-service advertisements for missing children. The last page was always a list of links to other places of interest to crime fiction readers, including competing ezines, publishers, organizations, etc. My ezine was listed there, as was my publishing house, and Vicki never asked us for a dime. She did it out of courtesy and a desire to help fellow authors and publishers.

But there were no paying ads in the magazine that I ever saw, even though her rates were very reasonable. The truth is, I was just about to put in an advertisement when Vicki contacted me about the possibility of the ezine shutting down in the near future. But "just about to" from one advertiser is not going to save the boat from sinking.

The proliferation of "free" content on so many online sites has made it difficult for those who charge a fee to make a go of it. We have become so accustomed to so many free things (freeware, free information, free sites, free this and that) that we often balk at paying, even when the price is reasonable and the product is desirable. "I can get that same sort of thing for free at [you fill in the blank here.]" I think it's an American thing that is growing, perhaps, along with the idea of super-sizing everything for a few pennies more.

Just a couple of weeks ago I was signing books at the Fall Festival in Calhoun, Georgia, and a couple of ladies came up to my table to look at my books. They looked at the front covers, read the back cover, flipped through the books and seemed on the verge of buying. One of them asked me "How much are your books?" The books they were looking at were $8.95 each, perfect-bound books, and I told them the price.

One of the women looked scandalized and put the book down with a decided thud. "I can get a big, thick book for that much!" she said. (My books were about 200 pages and 230 pages, respectively.)

I just smiled and bit my tongue, thinking at the same time, "Yes, and you can get a FREE copy of the telephone directory, which is MUCH thicker, but you wouldn't enjoy reading it."

But back to the demise of Great Mystery and Suspense... Those of you who only borrow magazines from others or read them in the library, please consider: that magazine is not going to stay in existence without subscribers or buyers.

I'm not saying that subscribers pay for the production of the magazine. Far from it: a mag like Great Mystery and Suspense costs about $2.25 to print and $1.60 send out, and it was only $25 to subscribe for the four quarterly issues, including postage. When you consider that many large-format magazines are published monthly, in full-color, and only charge $22 per year for subscribers, you might wonder about that. But I have a big listing of magazine markets in front of me, and it tells a lot about each mag. Some are not honest enough to release their advertising percentages, but here are some that do: Field and Stream: 112 pages, 32% advertising; Fate: 128 pages, 15% advertising; Brides: 186 pages, 50% advertising; Playgirl: 96 pages, 30% advertising.

The more advertisers a magazine is able to attract, the more cheaply they can sell their subscriptions. They know that it's not subscribers who pay the bills--it's the ads. But lest I be misunderstood, though subscribers themselves are not the life-or-death of a magazine, circulation IS! For example, Inside Kung Fu (130 pages, 65% advertising!!) has a subscription base that is only 15% of its total circulation of 110,000! The rest are sold through newsstands and bookstores. But it IS circulation--110,000 printed, published copies, placed out there and available for the public to peruse and purchase. That circulation figure is what impresses advertisers, and why Inside Kung Fu is able to sell so much advertising space, even with a small subscription base. They probably don't really care very much how many of their copies in bookstores actually get sold, because as long as they can report that big circulation number, they can sell a lot of ad space, and that's what pays the bills.

A small, relatively-new magazine like GM&S doesn't have as much of a chance of selling ad space. After all, nobody much knows about them. They're an unknown quantity. I believe GM&S was only carried in one or two bookstores, so that part of the circulation figure was depressed, and I'm willing to bet that they had 100 subscribers or less--not because they were not a good magazine (because they WERE) but because (1) people had not heard of them and (2) there are so many sources of "free" crime, suspense and mystery stories on the 'Net, "why pay for them?" It's the same old saw that Mom's used to tell their daughters in the Fifties: "Honey, why would he buy the cow when he can get the milk for free?"

Let's put the numbers together for a moment:

Four issues a year
Average of $475 per issue for stories, so $1900 a year to authors
Printing costs for 200 copies per issue (to fulfill 100 subscribers and have some for one-off sales): minimum of $450 per issue, so that's another $1800 annually
Cost of sending out 100 copies (postage and such) $160 per quarter, so that's $640 annually

That adds up to about $4340 per year in expenses. It doesn't include the cost of the website, hosting, etc., which has to happen.

Income from subscriptions: $2600
Income from advertisers: $0 (that I could see)
Net income from another fifty copies of each issue sold as one-offs:$107.50 per quarter, or $430 per year

All that adds up to $3030 annual revenue. We're still in the red by over $1,300 annually, and that doesn't include the website and other operating expenses (phone, electricity, etc.) which would take us even deeper into the hole. Even if we only printed 100 copies to fulfill the subscribers' needs, it would reduce the expenses by $900 a year... but also reduce the income by $430 a year, so that's a net gain of only $470.

Now, don't get the idea that I'm criticizing Vicki and Mike for what they tried to do. They were troopers for sticking it out as long as they did, in my estimation. The truth is, though, as a new venue with very few people who knew about them and a low circulation, it was very hard to convince advertisers to pay for space. And Vicki was so generous with payments to authors from the outset that the little bit of money coming in from magazine sales just bled away.

In retrospect, they might have done better to

pay lower fees to authors for the first year
try to line up advertisers from day one
work on getting their mag into places like coffee shops and bookstores as well as relying on subscriptions, even if they didn't make any money on the retail sales, because it would all count as circulation.

But it's easy to sit to one side and observe like I'm doing here. I don't disagree with their decision to stop publishing. I think they did the best thing they could do, under the circumstances. I think they have a strong grasp of the First Law of Holes: When you find yourself in a hole, stop digging!

But I'm going to miss Great Mystery and Suspense.

Writing creatively--a job?

2007-09-01T11:04:00.000-04:00

This posting will probably annoy a few authors. That's OK. I've never been known for my tact. And don't forget that I'm an author, too.

There have been a few discussions I've seen lately in different venues, both in print and online, that have me scratching my head. While writing of fiction may be an author's livelihood, it is not in any way comparable to a "job."

We (authors) all like to think of writing as a creative endeavor, as artistic as singing or painting or acting... yet when it comes right down to it, we often seem to wish to deny the most universal rule of artistic endeavors: the pay is usually slim, irregular and slow to arrive.

I hear authors who say, "My work is not for free! I don't write anything for anyone unless I get paid. The money must flow TO the writer, not away."

Hogwash.

I've never met a musician who was paid for every gig they performed, especially when they were in the early stages of their careers. They play for free, for food, for the beer... in other words, just to get their music out in front of people.

Actors almost invariably start out doing unpaid amateur theatrical work--little theater, community playhouses, etc. Painters usually have to beg for a place to hang their work in the beginning so they have a chance to get noticed and possibly get commissioned to do a work, or sell a piece of their work. The same goes for sculptors, weavers, and other artists. If they're good enough, and lucky enough, and in the right places at the right times--they eventually achieve some measure of success. What is it about writers that makes us think we have a RIGHT to be paid for everything we manage to publish, or to think we have a RIGHT to a regular income?

Sure, we do have to turn a business-like eye on things and count the cost of promotion, of doing business. It only makes sense. The publisher and bookseller must do the same thing, unfortunately, and that is often where the conflict comes into play. But to think that we as writers of stories deserve a regular paycheck of some sort, or have a right to be paid for our work, is ludicrous. Gauguin didn't have a right to be paid for his paintings, nor did Van Gogh. No artist has a right to be paid for his or her work unless it is work done for hire. Michelangelo was paid for his work in the Sistine Chapel because it was done on commission for Pope Julius II, and even then they argued about it.

It is impossible to draw an equivalency comparison between what an author does and what a textile worker does, or a plumber, printer or even a bookstore clerk. These people are working at the behest of and for the convenience of others, producing a product or providing a service for which there is a demand. As writers, we create something which WE feel a need to create. We pour ourselves into it and then try to find someone else who will value it at least as much as we do. Sometimes that doesn't happen. So, we give up or we rewrite it or we start a new story... but the process is repetitive: we still have to find someone else who wants out story and will (we hope!) pay us for it and publish it.

Brutal honesty time here: If you want a regular paycheck for your work, get out of writing unless you want to do work for hire. If you feel you must be a writer, then be a technical writer, copywriter or journalist, and write what someone else tells you to write so you can be paid a regular wage.

But if you want to be an author of creative works, free to write what you wish when you wish, then stop griping about how much money you make and about how much it costs you to make the money you DO make. You chose to be a writer. You chose to abandon sensible ways of making a living such as being a carpenter, firefighter or test pilot.

Understand: I'm not saying that we shouldn't be paid what we are TOLD we will be paid. I'm not saying that a publisher has the right to withhold royalties from an author or ignore contractual obligations. All I'm saying is, when we are in a creative career field, our possibility of income is a very nebulous thing, depending much upon the vagaries of public opinion. A writer is a lot like an inventor, week after week creating new devices he or she thinks will be the Next Big Thing. But if consumers aren't interested, or the inventor can't find a manufacturer, no matter how wonderful an idea may be it won't make any money. Being a writer, like being an inventor, is no way to have a regular paycheck.

Well, the description DOES say occasional...

2007-08-29T04:22:00.000-04:00

Life has been full, and something has to take a back-burner position, ergo this delayed posting.

But I recently received such a ... ummm... well... unique? Yeah, that's it. I recently received a rather unique query letter for a story to be published in my ezine, Crime and Suspense. In the interest of aiding all you writers with high hopes of being published, I'm going to put it here, in all its unvarnished glory, with the exception of changing the names/emails to protect the privacy of the poor wight.

Here we go:
____________________

Mr. X. Xxxxxxxx word count

Post Office Box XXX

Davenport, XX #####

XXXXXXXXX@yahoo.com

'Dear Editor,

Please consider my submission for your publication.

Thank you,

Mr. X. Xxxxxxxx'

ABOVE IS WHAT I'VE BEEN SENDING TO PUBLISHERS. I DON'T LIKE QUERIES, BIOS, NOR COVER LETTERS . I AM NOT INTERESTED IN CULTIVATING RELATIONSHIPS WITH EDITORS, PUBLISHERS , NOR THE PUBLIC. I DON'T WRITE WHAT'S SELLING NOWADAYS; I WRITE SATIRICAL STORIES WITH SUBTLE ALEGORICAL IMPLICATIONS. I'M EITHER A TRUE GENIOUS OR A DAMNED FOOL. I LIKE THREE PEOPLE ON THE PLANET AND YOU MAKE FOUR IF YOU WANT TO DO SOME BUSINESS.

X. XXXXXXXX

___________________

Now, let me address this on a couple of levels. First of all, there was no submission attached, although it does say that the writer would like me to consider his submission, and there is a space for "word count" although there are no numbers.

Secondly, although arrogance might work for some people, when they have a reason to be arrogant, this didn't. A person who types IN ALL CAPS, and can spell neither "genius" nor "allegorical" properly, has no reasons for arrogance, at least as a writer.

Thirdly, this individual either didn't bother to read the submission guidelines, or thought they didn't apply to him. That is NEVER a way to get on the good side of an editor.

Fourthly, when I rejected his initial query email and pointed out that (1) he hadn't included a submission and (2) he didn't follow the guidelines, he became abusive and wrote back to me with homophobic insults. Now, I'm not gay, and I'm not saying that it's insulting to BE gay, but when someone comes back with expressions like "you are so stupid, gayboy," it's obvious that the writer is attempting, however lamely, to be insulting.

That author is now filtered immediately into my email trash. It's obvious that I have not increased his count of "People I Like" to four.

Lesson to be learned from all this: If you are a writer seeking to be published in some market or venue, read the guidelines and follow them in your submissions. And DON'T TYPE IN ALL CAPS WITH MISSSSPELINGS AND BAD GRAMMAR, or become abusive when the editor rejects your work. The writing/publishing world is a relatively small one, and getting a reputation as a jerk or someone who is hard to work with is a quick way to reduce your chances of being published anywhere.

The "One Drop of Blood Rule" and Publishing

2007-07-14T18:42:00.000-04:00

Beginning in pre-colonial times in America and extending into the mid-twentieth century, there existed the One-Drop Rule. (There may in fact still be people who hold it to be true, but the majority of Americans do not think that way any more.)

What is the One-Drop Rule?

Well, if you didn't visit the link above, here's the short and bitter version: A person who had even "one drop" of sub-Saharan or Native American blood mixed in with their "otherwise pure" Western European blood was considered to be of sub-Saharan or Native American ancestry. For example, a person who had one black ancestor 8 generations back, with everyone else in the family being Caucasian, would still have been considered black.

The unfairness of this is not in titling someone "black" or "Indian" when they are a larger proportion white. Many people who have been so-titled are quite proud of that, and that's just fine. The unfairness is in regarding someone of such mixed ancestry to be somehow inferior, no matter what. We know that black people, Arabic people, Semitic people, Native American people, Oriental people and Western European people are all human. They are all equal in the eyes of God, or in the eyes of the Universe if you prefer. Why is this inferiority assumed, whether the person is of completely sub-Saharan ancestry, or is fifteen-sixteenths Caucasian? It's a fallacy, an error and abominable for any intelligent person to think that way.

"OK, Tony... thanks for the ethics and eugenics lecture. Now, what does this have to do with publishing??"

I'm glad you asked.

We who are in the writing and publishing biz all know what a subsidy publisher is. A subsidy publisher, for whatever reason (limited market, niche, specialized book, etc.) does not take the risk for a published book but rather asks the author to foot the bill and only handles the more mundane matters of formatting, editing (sometimes), page layout, cover design (again, sometimes), printing and distribution. Many people will lump vanity presses and subsidy presses together, and that's their choice, but in my mind the vanity press will print ANYTHING by ANYONE (see PublishAmerica's record for a good example), and the subsidy press is more selective. That's a personal differentiation, however, and may not be held by everyone.

Subsidy presses have a valid place in the book business. They serve very well for the following sorts of projects:

Specialized training books
Textbooks
Reference books with a very narrow market
Genealogies, family histories and other books where the market is likely to be very small
Books intended as gifts
Books used as part of a lecture or speaking tour
Books meant to be sold exclusively by the author, either directly or by mail/Internet
Where the author's main goal is to have the book published to use for some esoteric purpose other than selling through bookstores

My company, Wolfmont Publishing, and its secondary imprint, Honey Locust Press, occasionally do subsidy publishing for selected authors. I'm not ashamed of that. I have turned down many more manuscripts than I have accepted; the manuscript may have been "unsavory" or pornographic, it may have been racist or full of hate, it may have been litigation-inspiring (you'd be amazed what some people think you can get away with printing!!) or it may simply have been so badly written I didn't want to wrangle with the author about all the editing that needed to be done.

As I stated above, I think subsidy publishing has a very valid and legitimate place in the book business. I've published a book of poetry that was intended as a gift for the poet's relatives, in memory of the poet's late son. I've published a book of radio plays (definitely a niche market!), where the author planned to be the primary seller from his website. I've published a book written by a minister that is a history of the translation of the King James Bible, used as a reference and for a course taught at a seminary. Again, this is a pretty narrow market. (Although, it was released less than a month ago and has sold almost 250 copies thus far--he did a signing today and sold over 25 at that signing.)

All of these were situations where the authors would have been hard-pressed to find a traditional, commercial publisher to take on the venture. (I would say it would be impossible, but you NEVER KNOW.) In all these situations, the authors were pleased with the results. Where is the harm in such a thing?

Oh. I did cooperatively-publish an anthology, where the seven authors each kicked in $50 (along with me), and in the fifteen months since the book's release the authors have each received almost $500 in royalties, with more to come. That's not a bad return on the $50 investment and the 4,200 words maximum they wrote for the anthology.

Commercially, I have published:
UNDER A RAGING MOON, a novel by Frank Zafiro
BY THE CHIMNEY WITH CARE, an anthology which raised $1,365 for Toys for Tots
FOOLS RUSH IN, a novel by Sunny Frazier
CRIME AND SUSPENSE ANTHOLOGY I by various authors
BLINDED BY DARKNESS, a novel by Tony Burton
A WICKED GOOD PLAY, a novel by Tony Burton

"Ummmm... Tony, we STILL don't know how this is tied to the One-Drop Rule!!"

OK, OK... I'm getting to it! Recently, a friend of mine was looking at a site known for making sweeping pronouncements about the advisability of using certain publishers. (I won't name them here because I don't want to give them any more press than they already get.) Personally, I've always taken their recommendations with a grain of salt because of the arrogance with which these judgments are posted, and because all it takes is one sour customer for the axe to fall.

She told me that Wolfmont Publishing is listed there as "a subsidy publisher." Now, while I don't find that subsidy publishers are bad people inherently or that subsidy publishing is an Evil Thing, I do know that many authors are looking for a commercial publisher. So, I wrote the people in charge of this web site. I gave them the same information I just posted above, and suggested that, since the majority of my work is commercial/traditional publishing, that I simply be listed as "a book publisher."

Here is the response:
"Writers have a right to know that you also subsidy publish. While a subsidy publisher can also publish commercially, ************** is of the opinion that the subsidy description must take precedence."

Hence, my reference to the One-Drop Rule.

I have written to the person who administers the site and asked them to consider listing the fact that I publish both commercially and via subsidy. We'll see what the response is. Until then, I suppose as long as I have one drop of subsidy, I'm a subsidy press.

"We shall overcome..."
(come on, sing with me!)

The Sexual Politics of Writing and Publication

2007-07-08T00:50:00.001-04:00

I've heard a lot of hot air blowing around lately about the lack of fairness in the crime/suspense/mystery writing arena(s), with regard to gender. I'm all for being fair. Heck, I'm a member of the Sisters In Crime, for crying out loud! But maybe it's not all about gender.

Here are my opinions, for what they are worth:

(1) If you write crime/mystery/suspense, you CHOSE to write it. Therefore, if you think the competition from the "other side" is too intense, maybe you need to write something else. The thing is, men have been writing this stuff for longer than women have; it only makes sense that there are more of them represented. It's logical, even if it isn't "fair." I have yet to see, in my over fifty years, any worthwhile endeavor that is always and inherently "fair." Even Life is not, and it was devised by a Higher Power than any human.

(2) Conversely, if I went into the romance genre, where women are the predominant writers, I would have no recourse to whine and moan about the competition being overloaded with women. There again, women have been the major writers of romance fiction for years and years. It would be patently stupid of me to gripe about men not being adequately represented.

(3) I'm not so foolish as to think that no bias exists. Sure it does. But it's not unique to Crime/Mystery/Suspense writing. Bias exists, in one form or another, in every form of endeavor and/or competition. Chess teams don't get the kind of financial backing that basketball teams do, and women's basketball teams don't usually get the kind of financial backing that the men's basketball teams do. Kids in inner-city schools don't get the same breaks that the kids in suburban schools get. All else being equal, white men usually have a harder time getting a small business loan than white women do, and ethnic women usually have an easier time getting a small business loan than white women do. (Remember, I said “all else being equal.”)

Get a grip. Write. Write your very VERY best. Submit, and submit it again if it gets rejected. Polish it, put it in an envelope and kiss it goodbye as you submit it once more.

Then go sit down and write something else. But don't waste your energy worrying about why someone else gets a better chance than you do.

And to view the results of a recent poll on the topic of "Author Gender versus Genre" in the crime, mystery and suspense fields of fiction, go HERE.

Ye Gads!

2007-06-28T00:45:00.000-04:00

You know, it's a lucky thing for many people that I am neither God nor even a powerful demigod. About two weeks ago my main computer was attacked by a trojan/virus, and it has wreaked havoc and ruination. Ticked me off, too, which is why it's good for those who write such things that I don't have the power to blast them out of existence in manner messy and painful.

Read and be forewarned...

For over a year, I used F-Secure, a fantastic antivirus program and firewall. One of the best I've ever known, truth be told. But it's only available as a download from the creators, at least in this country. My subscription was about to run out, so I was in Office Depot one day in late May and a salesperson says to me (as I ruminated in the software aisle), "You should try the Norton 360! It's on sale, and it's a great deal!"

Since I was in imminent need of AV protection, and the Norton 360 product seemed to have a lot of features—plus, hey, isn't it okay to trust Peter Norton??—I decided to purchase the product and install it. Installation went smoothly and the software seemed to work. It also had a firewall and automatic backup facilities... very slick and integrated.

After about a week, my computer started to slow down for no apparent reason. Then, the browser would seemingly open of its own accord, popping up to screens inviting me to search for great deals on a new car, or to find a soul mate, or to buy some sort of antivirus software that I had never heard of. I wouldn't even be accessing the Internet, and this would happen!

So, I ran a forced scan with Norton 360 and guess what? It found a virus! It also told me that it couldn't remove this virus, that I needed to contact the Norton mothership for help.

I contacted them and after being in queue for some time, managed to hook up with Amit. Amit required several explanations of the problem, but eventually he understood. And eventually he also told me that it was beyond his power to help me: I needed to be in touch with the Virus Removal Team!

He transferred me to the VRT (don't you love acronyms!?) and after being in queue again for some time, I managed to hook up with Pradesh. I explained.... once more in painful detail... the problem to Pradesh. After he repeated my sentences back to me a few times, the following dialogue took place:

Pradesh: Ah, Mr. Burton, we can remove that virus and get you going again!

Me: Wonderful! Let's get started.

Pradesh: Sure, Mr. Burton. All I need from you is your credit card number and...

Me: Excuse me?!? I just bought this less than two weeks ago and it's not working! I'm within my support period, correct?

Pradesh: Mr. Burton, I understand that you are upset, but do not worry, we can get rid of that virus for you and educate you on how not to acquire another one. But this is a paid consultation.

Me: And how much will it cost?

Pradesh: Mr. Burton, it will be $99.95 for me to take control of your computer, clean out the virus and educate you on how to avoid this in the future.

Me: But I just bought and installed your product. I have not had a virus or trojan to get into my system for over a year and within two weeks of installing Norton 360 my life is hell! And you are telling me, since your software FAILED to protect me sufficiently, you have to charge me $99.95 to remove the virus that YOUR software allowed to infect the computer in the first place?? That's *&%$@#@!!

Pradesh: Mr. Burton, I understand you are upset. But this is the best I can offer you.

Me: Well, Mr. Pradesh, the best I can offer you is to say NO and tell everyone I know about how lousy this software is, and how much like an old-time protection racket your virus removal service is. *click*

The manager of the Office Depot, Bobby, was very nice. When I went in and told him what happened, he agreed with me that it was *&%$@#@ for them to want to charge me like that and he promptly refunded my money, while recommending a better product. He also told me that if I had asked HIM instead of the sales clerk on the floor that day, he would have told me not to waste my money on Norton because it was worthless and primarily just window-dressing.

BUT! Although that part of the story is now happier, the agony continued. Remember I said that the Norton 360 was supposed to be backing things up for me? Well, it did back up... a few things. It did NOT successfully back up the .PST files from Outlook which I told it to back up. It did NOT back up my postage records from my shipping software. I managed to lose about a months worth of recent email and about 30% of my address book. I have a BIG address book, so that's a lot of names and addresses. Luckily I had manually backed up some of my Outlook PSTs from before I bought the Norton 360, and was able to recover at least that data. But all my postage log, with names, dates, amounts spent on postage, etc., disappeared.

Sooooo... I am out of the cyber-ICU, but I'm still in Recovery. I have a new, better antivirus program, and am running Spyware Doctor as well as SpyBot S&D

I hope to have much less worry about such issues in the future, anyway, since I recently ordered an iMac from Apple, and it is supposed to arrive sometime on June 29. According to all the people I have talked to, the Mac has only a very few viruses that attack it... compared to the over 114,000 that are lusting to get into a Windows-based PC.

Now all I have to do is learn how to use a new type of computer, and buy a lot of replacement software in their Mac versions.

No-Fee Writing Contest on Crime and Suspense!

2007-05-29T22:59:00.000-04:00

I guess I am remiss in announcing this, but there is still plenty of time before the deadline.

The "Austin Camacho Beltway Crime Writing Contest" is now in progress at Crime and Suspense ezine. It's a NO-FEE contest (Woo-Hoo!!) but has some neat prizes. My good buddy Austin Camacho, author of (among other things) the Hannibal Jones mystery series and the Stark & O'Brien adventure series, has contributed a full signed set of his Hannibal Jones books for first prize, as well as two more signed Hannibal Jones books for second prize and a copy of the Crime and Suspense Anthology I with his story signed for third prize.

The deadline for submission is June 15th, at midnight eastern time. For full details on word count, theme, etc., go to the Crime and Suspense web site and click on the link for the contest.

To blurb or not to blurb...

2007-05-16T09:34:00.000-04:00

It's funny, but the discussion of blurbs: how to get them, whether you need them, when to give them and how honest to be, came up on two discussion lists I frequent in the last couple of weeks. I have to admit I got a little verbose about the subject, but I think the observations are sound, so I'm going to repeat them here. If you have a comment or something to say on the subject, please feel free to tell me!

And even though I request blurbs, and will give them if asked AND if I can honestly do so, I really dislike them.

I dislike them because they are, in many ways, an imposition on the author being asked for one and I hate imposing on an already-busy person. Should she be honest? Should she be "over the top" complimentary? Does she really have the TIME to read the book so she can give an honest blurb. I know I won't give a blurb unless I have read the entire book, though I do know a few people who will quickly scan the book. One person told me she reads the first two chapters the middle chapter and the last two chapters, whether blurbing or reviewing. (No, I won't reveal the name!)

I read of one mid-list author who said he receives between 15 and 20 books a WEEK asking him for a blurb, and he simply can't do it. How do you decide, if you have this kind of blurb-request traffic???

I also dislike them because they are so very, very subjective and say as much about the blurber as they do about the book. Does the fact that Stephen King loved a book mean I will love it? Does a ravingly positive blurb by an author I detest mean I will also detest this new book by someone else??

I know one very well-known A-list author who has told me point-blank that he DOES NOT read anyone else's work in the crime genre, or for that matter, very much fiction at all. His reason was that he didn't want to have his own voice affected by the voice of another author. But, since that is so, I now hold any blurb written by that man to be very suspect. Did he read it or not? Was he lying to me then, or lying to the reader now?

I had one book blurbed before, where I knew that the blurber, even though very complimentary, had not read the book very thoroughly. She made a very distinct factual error in the blurb. This person admitted later that she had not read the book through, but had skimmed it and with her permission, I changed that part of her blurb.

If I look at the 3,000-plus books on my shelves, I notice that books published in the sixties to mid-seventies had hardly anything on the back cover, other than perhaps a quote from a major review venue: NYT, the Chicago Tribune, whatever, and usually about a prior book. Then comments from other sources started appearing in the late seventies and eighties, until now you can't find a book without a blurb containing lots of stars and exclamation points unless the poor soul is blighted enough to not know anyone who will write one!

I wish they weren't needed. I wish we could have a synopsis of the book on the back cover, with perhaps a pithy quote about a previous work from some review venue and maybe some information about the author. But, the reality is that they are a necessary evil, so I will continue to ask for them and to give them when I can. I simply fear the the curse of "blurb inflation" will become so bad that they are ALL meaningless, whether accurate or not, because no one will know which ones to trust.

A Garden Party of Authors

2007-05-02T00:07:00.000-04:00

This past Sunday I was privileged to be a part of the Heflin, Alabama, Garden Party of Authors. Heflin is a small town, with under 2,000 inhabitants... yet they managed to pull together ten authors from a variety of locations in the Southeast, and assembled about 70 people who were willing to pay for a ticket to have (a DELICIOUS) luncheon and spend five minutes with each of the ten authors.

I was made to feel very, very welcome and had the opportunity to meet some wonderful people as well as seeing again some people I already knew. Clara Cavender organized this event, the second one they have held, and she did a grand job!

One of the really unique things that happened there, had to do with the mayor. The mayor, the Hon. Anna L. Berry, is also the head of the Heflin Arts Council. She was there to greet us, and went so far as to give each author a key to the city of Heflin! I'm fifty years old, and this is my first municipal key, ever! It's a big, heavy brass key with a nice golden tassel hanging from it... and of course, since I write crime and mystery stories, I hefted it in my hand with an eye toward its potential use as a murder weapon. (Just kidding, Mayor Berry! Really!!)

On a mercenary note, I was able to sell and sign some books, including some to the Heflin Library, which I hope serves to introduce more people to my work!

Great weekend, all around.

Writing contests, and the vagaries of setting them up

2007-04-28T01:29:00.000-04:00

I try to hold a writing contest every so often through my ezine, Crime and Suspense. I've held two thus far this year, and plan on having at least one or two more. The prizes have been nice, but... I didn't feel the excitement from the entrants, you know?

So, I set up a survey to ask people who read the Crime and Suspense ezine what they would like to see in a contest... what would encourage them to enter, that sort of thing.

But why hold a survey? Why not just go ahead and hold a contest? Darn the torpedoes and full speed ahead!!

History...
Last year, I set up a contest called the Publish Me! contest. The entrants would submit the first two chapters of their magnum opus and pay an entry fee of $30. Two judges (well-known published authors in the genre) would read and score the submissions. The winner would get his/her story published by my publishing company, cover designed, 100 marketing postcards and fifty copies of the book (up to 300 pages), and have their book set up for distribution through Ingram and Baker & Taylor. The second and third place winners could have their books, if they wanted, set up as ebooks and marketed on the Wolfmont Publishing web site.

If you've never run a contest similar to this, you may not understand the costs: the judges have to be paid SOMETHING. There's the cost of the cover design, the postcards, the book setup and printing, the catalog listing, etc., etc. People expressed interest and sounded excited... but when I started the contest, only five people entered. Since I needed at least fifteen people to break even, it simply wasn't financially feasible to finish the contest!

Thankfully, I had given that caveat to each entrant; to wit, if I didn't have fifteen entries by a certain date that I would refund their money to them. Even with that, however, it bothered me to have to start a contest and then disappoint the entrants like that. So, I'm doing a miniature "feasibility study" to see if it's worth it to try a contest with bigger prizes again.

I'm curious... why are people so averse to paying to enter a contest with a significant prize? I don't understand the logic that says, "Prizes must not cost anything because the contest holder is giving them away!" And I've had more than a couple of people say to me, "Oh, reputable contests don't charge fees!" Excuse me? Writer's Digest isn't reputable? Glimmer Train? The Writer magazine? Byline magazine?

It's a little amusing, if sad, to see a respondent say to me, "I don't enter contests with fees" or "Charge $5 for the entry fee," yet also say to me in response to what a judge should receive for judging the contest, "A fee of $150" or "A $100 honorarium." And from where should that fee or honorarium be derived?

I know... there ARE people who run so-called contests which are scams to take your money. Thing is, I have yet to make any money on a contest I have run. In fact, with the last three or four contests I've held, the awards have been least partially out of my pocket and without payment of entry fees. Warner Brothers was nice enough to contribute some t-shirts, hats and posters, but some people don't get very excited about prizes like that so I threw in some Amazon gift certificates of my own.

"But money must always flow TO the writer, not away!" Oh, Lord, would that it were so!! Let's see... editors' fees, promotional bookmarks and postcards, writing courses, signing trips where the cost of transportation and lodging is over $400 and the total profit from books sold is less than $50, the cost of mailing out review copies that may never get reviewed, trips to writer cons and fan cons, buying ink and toner cartridges and paper... it ALL Costs Money! It makes as much sense as saying "Money must always flow to the employee, not away!" What about cost of training for the job? Taxes? Paying for benefits? Paying for parking and/or commuting? There are costs associated with EVERY form of moneymaking, whether it is writing, being a nurse or working in a factory. To say that every attempt to make money with writing should be free of risk of my OWN money is foolish in the extreme, and limits me tremendously.

I'm not at all attacking anyone, and especially anyone who simply can't budget an entry fee. I've been where money was tight before, where I wondered where my next tank of gas would come from... so I understand that. But for those who think that no opportunity to make money or gain recognition should cost the author money... it simply isn't reality. The costs are there, whether we choose to acknowledge them or not.

Yes, there are free contests, and God bless the people who hold or sponsor them. I hold them myself pretty regularly, and God bless me, too! But when people are lackadaisical about entering because the prizes are small, token prizes, yet are not willing to put their money where their writing is to take a shot at a larger prize, I have no sympathy.

*** If you think your writing is good enough to win, then why is it a risk to spend $5 or $10?

*** If you don't think you have a good chance of winning, then why are you entering at all?

Have faith in your writing, and be willing to back up your beliefs with an entry fee once in a while.

Book signings and signed books

2007-04-20T12:26:00.000-04:00

I'll be signing books and meeting some very nice people at the Moveable Feast of Authors in Heflin, Alabama on April 29. If you happen to be anywhere around Heflin on that Sunday, please drop by and see me!

Also, I will be at the Calhoun-Gordon County Library in Calhoun, Georgia on May 5, during the "More Than a Taste of Calhoun" festival. I'll be reading from my books and signing books there, as well. Again, I'd love to see any of you!

Finally, if you have purchased one of my two novels (Blinded by Darkness or A Wicked Good Play) in a location where you couldn't get it signed by me, here's your chance! Drop by my personal web site and fill out the form telling me what books you purchased, etc., and submit it. I'll sign a signature book plate and drop it in the mail to you just as quickly as I can! Such a deal, huh?

Launching, contest winners and such

2007-04-01T18:28:00.000-04:00

The last time I posted, I mentioned that Jem and Scout (the two recently-hatched additions to our Finch family) had not left the nest. Well, about three days ago all of their parents' twitterings must have had an effect, because they are now out of the nest and flying about on their own. Of course, this necessitated getting a bigger cage. Even though finches are small, four of them in a tiny cage is not a good situation!

The guineas we moved have settled in well, too, laying quite a few eggs. We added a nesting box to their pen, to encourage them to get "broody" and hatch the eggs, but so far the maternal instincts of the hens have been poor. So, we've been eating guinea-egg omelets and using guinea eggs in the pancakes and cornbread. They taste fine, but let me tell you—the shells are doggone hard! I had to whack one three times on the countertop tonight to crack it, and I don't mean a light tap. Sounded like hitting a cueball on the formica top.

The recent Southern Gone Wrong writing contest (inspired by Cathy Pickens's books) at the Crime and Suspense ezine (my baby!) has just finished up, and the winners were selected by vox populi. If you'd like to read the winners, or in fact any of the entrants' stories, just drop by the Crime and Suspense site. There's a link on the main page there. The first and second place winners each will receive a signed copy of a Cathy Pickens book, and the two third place winners (a tie) are getting a copy of BODIES WE'VE BURIED, a book about the national CSI training school and their procedures.

I will have more contests in the coming months, and would love to have your story as an entry. The last three writing contests have been "no fee" contests, and I like to keep them that way whenever possible. Of course, that often means I must rely, as Blanche DuBois, "upon the kindness of strangers" for prizes and so forth. Hey, the ezine has no subscription fee and comes out monthly, rain or shine!

Drop by and read the stories in the contest, take a look at the previous month's issue, download an old-fashioned radio drama, and maybe even subscribe. Like I said, it's a freebie.

Spring Book Show 2007 and other craziness

2007-03-24T23:17:00.000-04:00

Not necessarily in order of occurrence...

This weekend I was a presenter and attendee at the Spring Book Show 2007 in Atlanta, GA. I enjoyed myself there, and gained a view of the book publishing and selling world that was very vague to me before now.

By the way, did you know that (according to a speaker there), there were over 170,000 new titles published in the United States last year? Yep. One hundred seventy THOUSAND new titles. Sort of makes the inner eye of the mind go all unfocused, doesn't it? If you are a writer, your Great New Book last year was competing for attention... and shelf space in the store... and the consumer's dollar... against about 169,999 other new books.

If you are a publisher, you had to be SUPER-selective about which titles you chose to risk money publishing, because money spent on books that don't sell, either TO the store or once they get IN the store, is wasted money.

The Spring Book Show is all about the Remainders and Returns market. It is where books that didn't sell, either from the publisher or from the retailer, get "recycled" in an effort to try to make some money, somehow, for someone. I saw a LOT of dealers there, and none of the book dealers were selling single books. The closest thing I saw to a retail sale was a dealer who allowed you to buy a minimum of three of a title, but your order had to be $100 or more. So you either bought three VERY, VERY expensive books, or three copies each of nine or ten books, because a lot of books were selling for $1, $2, or a little more. One dealer had a minimum $1000 order from any single FOB point. I tell you, it was a little bit overwhelming.

Books were being sold by case lots, by "Gaylord" box full and in numbers that literally went into the hundreds of thousands, for one buyer.

What was I doing there?

I was teaching at a seminar being held on Friday and Saturday, and my presentation was on "The Trials and Tribulations of Starting a Publishing Business." Most appropriate, I think. I sold a couple of books, too, though that wasn't my main reason for being there.

Other recent events for me:

If you've read much of my blog, you know Dear Wife and I are working on creating a haven on a little over 16 acres of land in the mountains of North Georgia. I finally had the time to rent the equipment to dig the trenches for all the water lines we have to run for the orchard and garden beds. The bloody thing weighed 6,000 pounds. Here's a picture:

And since the guineas were sitting right where the trench needed to go, Dear Wife and I ended up moving the guineas, pen and all, to a new location. I had to strap the little guinea house to the front of the trencher to move it, since it was so heavy. Oh, and the eight guineas were inside it when we moved it, too. They really didn't like that aspect of it, I don't think.

But they are now in their new location and seem to be very happy there.

Speaking of birds, we also have some little zebra finches who live in the house with us. In a cage, not loose! Atticus and Arabella are their names. But actually, we have more than that now! About two weeks ago, two of their eggs hatched and we now have two MORE in the Finch family, Jem and Scout.

Like the recent movie, Failure to Launch, Atticus and Arabella seem to have some problems getting their little ones to leave the nest. The babies are almost as big as their parents, but have yet to poke even a single feather outside their woven-twig nursery. I believe Atticus is getting annoyed with this, too, because he has taken to sitting on the door of the next and rather angrily twittering at them. I can just imagine what he is saying: "Get outta there! What do you think, all we want to do is to chew up seeds, bring them in here and upchuck them for you?? Get up, find a job, you little freeloaders!!" But they sit there in silence, their black, beady eyes shining up out of the nest. I think Atticus has taken to drink. I found a tiny, empty bottle of Four Roses at the bottom of their cage.

Have a great weekend!

Tony

Bookmark success! PrintPlace comes through

2007-03-11T18:40:00.000-04:00

Well, folks, I have to give PrintPlace credit: after a true dramedy of errors, they came through with flying colors.

The order from PrintPlace came to my house, and I opened it up. The bookmarks looked pretty good on first inspection, but then I noticed that one of the graphic elements was missing. It was a minor thing, so I decided not to worry about it. But then I counted how many bookmarks they shipped me. I ordered 2000. I received about 720. THAT wouldn't do!

I called Nic back, and spoke with him about it. Strangely enough, although he was surprised about the missing graphic element, the shortage didn't surprise him. It seems he had received almost twenty calls that same morning from other people whose orders were shorted, so he was going to go down to the production floor and give a lesson in Basic Counting to the people running the presses!

Nice guy that he is, he set up a new order for me, told me to resubmit my artwork and make sure the graphic element was there, and he's have them printed (all 2000 of them) and shipped to me posthaste. No extra charges.

The order arrived Wednesday of this week, and I'm very pleased. All the bookmarks were there, and the artwork looked just as it did when I sent it. In fact, I'm so pleased, I ordered some more stuff from them the same day.

I figure, everybody makes mistakes. But only a good businessperson stands up and takes responsibility to make good on the mistake.

My take, anyway.

Tony

The Bookmark Saga

2007-02-27T23:55:00.000-05:00

Things are looking up! The day after I filed a complaint about The Print Place with the BBB in Arlington, TX, I received a phone call from their customer service manager, Nic.

What it came down to was this:

He was very sorry for what happened
The person who had taken the order, pretended to be a "Director" and generally messed me over had been fired
I wasn't the only person to complain about said former employee
I was right—their online template HAD BEEN screwed up, and they were in the process of fixing it
They would refund my money if I wanted

Nic and I had a conversation about things, very amicably. I agreed to try their service by resending the graphics to him once more, and I ordered the bookmarks. They are refunding the amount of money I paid to them that is not applied to the order. The bookmarks should arrive by March 1, and when they do, I'll let everyone here know about their quality.

I'm really glad I'm not going to have to fill out the fraud report form that my credit card company sent to me, because it's a pain in the tuchas.

Tony Burton
Check out Blinded By Darkness and A Wicked Good Play

Bookmark refund? NOT!!

2007-02-20T00:37:00.000-05:00

Well, The Print Place has yet to refund any money to me. I called the representative, Corey McGrath, last week, one week after faxing them the refund request form he sent to me.

I asked him about the status of the refund, since I checked my credit card account daily and had seen no refunds. (It's pretty interesting that they can CHARGE my card within minutes, but somehow it's a lot more difficult to give me BACK the money they took from me.) He sounded surprised that the refund had not yet been issued, and asked for a callback number so he could call me back that day (Thursday) with an answer.

It's Tuesday, and still no refund has hit my credit card, and I have yet to hear from Mr. McGrath. I went to the BBB website for their city (Arlington, TX) and found that they already had a complaint file established.

Wow, WHAT a SURPRISE! (Do you hear the sarcasm in that??)

Anyway, I filed a complaint with the BBB Online, and later today I'll be calling my credit card company to get THOSE wheels in motion. I have also emailed Mr. McGrath about his failure to honor his word.

We'll see what happens. Over $120 is at stake, as well as this company's veracity and reputation.

Conferences, book sales and bookmarks

2007-02-12T20:42:00.000-05:00

As some of you may have read earlier, I was scheduled to be a part of the Murder In the Magic City and Murder On the Menu events in Alabama this past weekend. Well, I drove over late Friday night and checked into the Drury Inn (great place for the price, by the way--they had a real breakfast, and it was free!) On Saturday, I was part of the first panel of the day with Denise Swanson, JoAnna Carl, Patricia Sprinkle and Heather Webber. (Four lovely ladies and me... am I lucky or what??)

Directly after that, the intriguing and prolific author, Thomas H. Cook, stood up and spoke to the group. The rest of the day included three more panels and book signing sessions, and the talented Laura Lippman addressed the group in the afternoon. I got to meet some wonderful folks, many of whom were authors. I also managed to sell quite a few books, and signed most of those, so it was a great day all around. Margaret Fenton, the president of the Southern Sisters chapter of the Sisters In Crime, organized the event and did a bang-up job on it.

The next day all the authors travelled in a caravan to a little town with fewer than 6,000 souls, Wetumpka, Alabama to attend Murder On the Menu. Delicious food, delightful readers and mystery fans, and great conversation. There, too, we sold and signed books. I got to meet a couple more authors who were NOT at the previous day's festivities, including meeting an old friend with whom I had corresponded for over a year, John M. Floyd (a contributor to By the Chimney With Care and Seven By Seven.)

If you would like to see a few photographs from these events, take a look at my ezine website, Crime and Suspense. There's a link there to a page with photos and a few comments about what went on there.

And about the bookmarks... I have yet to hear anything from The Print Place about my refund. I reiterate my previous statement: BEWARE this company!!

Bookmarks... get yer bookmarks here! NO! DON'T!!!

2007-02-08T14:06:00.000-05:00

For those of you who are authors or publishers, I wanted to share the recent fiasco I went through with The Print Place.

First of all, their website looks professional and friendly. I uploaded the graphics for the front and back of my bookmark, and checked them against the immediate proof template they show (via PDF or JPG). Although I had sized my graphic according to their specifications, it did not meet the bleed lines on the ends of the template, and there was a big warning underneath that said that such a situation could cause white space to appear around the edge of the bookmark. Since I didn't want that, I rejected the proof graphic and did not send the job to print. But there was no place to change the parameters of the bookmark without starting a new job.

So, I went and created new graphics for the front and back and set up a new bookmark job. With the new, larger dimensions that were larger than specified by the company, the bleed and trim lines were exactly aligned with the graphics as required.

However, the next day I received an email that said the graphics I submitted were too big, and would result in my bookmark text being cropped!

I decided to cancel the job, and discovered to my surprise and anger that BOTH jobs had already been charged against my credit card, for 1000 copies of each bookmark, without the proof being accepted, without the job being sent to press and without my consent.

I called the company, and they said that their "policy" is to charge for the print job immediately, even when it has not been approved or sent to print, because they "have to send the graphic through a piece of software that cost them $250,000." This was from a person who later claimed to be a director within the company, although his email sig line says "Sales Associate."

After some discussion, this person agreed to process the graphic files personally if I would send them to him. I sent them, and did not hear anything back. I followed up with a second email four days later, and still didn't hear anything. Finally today I called, and he said the files were awaiting my approval. I asked why I had not been notified, and he said my email must be bouncing his messages. I told him I had received other emails from the company, both automated and personal. He then sent a test email and it went through within seconds. Hmmmmmmm!

Finally, after much discussion where he tried to tell me that charging before the proof was accepted was the standard policy for ALL online printing companies (which I knew to be false, as I have worked with other online printing companies, notably Vista Print and Printing For Less), he agreed to refund the entire amounts to me, including a "non-refundable production fee" of $15 per job--to handle the overhead of their receiving the files, I guess. I just faxed them the refund forms, so we'll see if I actually get the entire amounts refunded. I'll keep the readers of this blog updated.

I am on a panel at a conference this weekend, and will be signing books at two events. I now will have NO bookmarks for either event.

This long narrative was simply to justify what I'm about to say next: As you love your sanity, don't use this company!

Tony
(One frustrated and very angry author and publisher)

Shall I return?

2007-01-10T09:35:00.000-05:00

OK... here's a question for those of you in the publishing and book trade: How do you deal with returns? Meaning, if you are a publisher, do you allow returns? And if you do allow them, is it across the board or are you selective? Do you set any limits?

And if you are a bookseller/storefront, will you order books that are non-returnable? More to the point, will you shelve books that are non-returnable?

I ask these questions because I'm trying to formulate my own returns policy, and I'm getting a lot of mixed messages, both from other publishers and from booksellers. For example, one bookseller has said she simply will NOT order books to shelve, if they are not returnable. Another said that they want the books returnable, but will pay the return postage. And another has said that they want returnable, but will only order books that are both returnable AND returnable at no expense to them.

One thing I have discovered in my investigations is that Baker & Taylor, at least, seem to have the best of all possible worlds when it comes to returns. If a bookstore returns a book they have purchased through Baker and Taylor, the bookstore must pay the postage to return the book. If I ALLOW returns through Baker and Taylor, I am charged $2 per book for the privilege, plus I must pay for the shipping to get the book back to me, else it is destroyed. And of course along with this, there is no guarantee that the books will be in a resalable condition. As one publisher acquaintance of mine has said, "If I want to sell damaged books, I don't have to send them to [bookstore name here] first. I can do the damage at home and save a lot of transaction costs!"

Understand that I'm not griping about the situation. The situation is what it is. I'm just trying to come up with a policy that is fair to both sides of the equation. Problematically, if I allow returns through my primary North American distributors (Amazon, Ingram, Baker & Taylor), I have no way of setting any limits. I can't say, "This bookseller can return books but this one cannot," or "I'll accept returns of no more than XX% of the bookseller's order." It's flat, across the board returns. For a small press, one or two bad orders under those sort of conditions could spell disaster.

So... what do you think?

Tony

Unusual Birthday Presents

2006-12-19T18:43:00.000-05:00

As you may or may not know, I'm blessed to be married to a wonderful woman, Lara. She and I both have birthdays in December, only one day apart. I was a little late with her birthday present this year (actually, I gave her one on time, but this one was a surprise I had to arrange to pick up.) You'd have to know her to really understand this, but for her birthday I gave her 3,800 pounds of rocks.

She is really into landscaping and such, and not long after we moved to Georgia, she told me, "Honey, don't worry about buying me jewelry or stuff like that. If you really want to make me happy, bring me live plants to set out, or rocks to use in landscaping." So, I made the arrangements, and today she and I took the trailer and Jeep to get 1.9 tons of happiness. She didn't know where we were going, and she was both surprised and very pleased with the gift.

I know, it sounds sexist, but how many women do you know who would rather have sandstone than diamond?

Tony

Travel and other news

2006-12-19T00:25:00.000-05:00

Last week my wife and I made a trip out to Denver to see our younger son, Jeremy, graduate from UC-Denver. Proud moment! He graduated with a BFA, majoring in graphic arts and multimedia. We were to fly back on Saturday, but the threat of incoming snow made us spring for changed tickets earlier than that.

I also received an invitation to be on a panel at the Spring Book Show 2007 Author-Publisher Seminar in Atlanta, March 23-24, 2007. That's a very cool thing, and I'm proud to be part of the Spring Book Show 2007!

Sunny Frazier's new book, Fools Rush In, is selling very well indeed--over 100 copies in the first three days of release. Not bad at all for a small press release of a debut novel! Go check it out, and read the first couple of chapters on the website.

Short-notice writing contest on Crime and Suspense

2006-12-11T12:34:00.000-05:00

Warner Bros. has once more contacted me about working with them to promote a new movie, "The Good German."

Toward that end, I have instituted a short-fiction writing contest on the site.  You have to write a flash piece (under 500 words) and use a picture there on the site as the inspiration or starter for your story.

Here's the way it goes:

1st place: $25 Amazon gift certificate 
2nd place: Movie-theme t-shirt
3rd place: Movie-theme fatigue cap
4th place: Movie poster

Anyway, if you want all the details, go to the Crime and Suspense website (http://www.crimeandsuspense.com) and check out the link on the main page.  There are pictures of the prizes (except for the gift certificate).

 
And get started writing!  You have very little time!

Tony

Fools Rush In

2006-12-04T00:13:00.000-05:00

Fools Rush In, Sunny Frazier's debut novel, is at the printer and should be available very soon! I'm very excited about this book, and quite frankly, so are the reviewers!

Kevin Tipple on epinions

Pat Reid on Books n Bytes

Lesa Holstine on Lesa's Book Critiques

Booksigning success!!

2006-12-04T00:00:00.000-05:00

Marie Peerson at Crosshaven Books and Margaret Fenton were extremely hospitable to my wife and myself on Saturday, December 2. The signing was what I consider a success: books sold, lovely people met and conversed with, great snacks, and new readership forged. Lara and I arose early on Saturday morning for the nearly-four-hour drive to Birmingham, Alabama, but it was a beautiful day for driving. Lara had never been in Alabama before, and she really loved the scenic countryside through which we drove.

We sold thirteen copies of By the Chimney With Care (which benefits the Toys for Tots), five copies of Blinded By Darkness, and a copy of Seven By Seven. Plus, Marie was gracious enough to have me sign a few copies of books to keep on her shelves for later purchase.

I also got to meet a very nice guy and fellow author, Jim Reed. Jim is an author, as I said, as well as having a variety of life experiences as a columnist and broadcaster. Plus, he has a great online bookstore for rare and out-of-print books, Reed Books. Drop in there and check out his work, which includes his books recorded on CD!

Writing events!

2006-11-24T00:35:00.000-05:00

It's been a busy week, but a good one. This week:

I was invited to a book signing at Crosshaven Books for their Christmas open house. Crosshaven is an independent bookstore in Birmingham, Alabama, owned and run by Marie Peerson. I'll be signing By the Chimney With Care, Blinded By Darkness, and if the shipment comes in, the new re-release of A Wicked Good Play. Keep your fingers crossed for the UPS man.
I was invited to participate as a panelist at Murder In the Magic City (also in Birmingham, Alabama) on February 10, 2007. I've heard a lot of good things about this conference, and I'm really looking forward to it!
I was invited to teach a class at the Harris Arts Center in Calhoun , GA. The class is "Writing and Publishing Your Short Story", and it will run for six weeks, starting in early January 2007.

So, I'm pretty excited about all this!

Yesterday, Lara and I were able to spend some great quality time with my parents, both our daughters, their husband and fiance', and our lovely granddaughter, Rebekah! Sort of a pre-thanksgiving, Thanksgiving. Rebekah is eight months old, and obviously knows she is the star of the show.

Ah, I said "fiance'" didn't I? Well, last night we got the official notification: Patti showed off a beautiful engagement ring that Dustan had given her earlier in the week, in a romantic proposal at Amicalola Falls. (I love that place!)

It's been a good week. I have much to be thankful for.

Tony

Seldom do I step down into the political mire, but...

2006-11-13T19:15:00.000-05:00

Today I sent an email to the President of the United States of America. "What temerity!" you say, "What gall!!" My email was prompted by a little news item about the Administration's lawyers stating that... oh, heck go HERE and read the news article for yourself.

Here is the text of my email.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Mr. President,

I realize that you personally probably read very few of these emails, but on the off-chance that my luck may be better than I suspect, that is how I started this email.

I also realize that, given that you cannot now be re-elected, my opinions and the opinions of hundreds of thousands of like-minded individuals probably mean very little to you. For that matter, they seem to have mattered very little prior to this time. After all, we are only citizens.

I am an American veteran. I joined the US Navy the same year I graduated from high school, and altogether spent over 12 1/2 years in active service. I have served and defended my country.

I am also a registered Republican. I voted for your father every time he ran, and I voted for you both times you were elected. I now deeply regret that last choice. Your actions of the last few months at first invoked disbelief, then dismay and at the last outrage at the way you have betrayed the trust of the people who elected you.

It is your actions, sir, and those of your officials, which prompted both my wife and myself to vote against any Republican on the ticket in this year's midterm election, simply as a way to try and assure that the same sort of heinous misgovernment does not continue. Unfortunately, Mr. President, this does nothing to correct the errors and missteps you and your administration have perpetrated, and continue to perpetrate, upon the people of this nation and even upon foreign nationals.

I leave you with these quotes, sir.

“Why of course the people don’t want war. Why should some poor slob on a farm want to risk his life in a war when the best he can get out of it is to come back to his farm in one piece? Naturally, the common people don’t want war: neither in Russia, nor in England, nor for that matter in Germany. That is understood. But after all it is the leaders of the country who determine the policy, and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship…Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is to tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger.” — Hermann Goering, at the Nuremberg Trials before he was sentenced to death

“The lie can be maintained only for such time as the State can shield the people from the political, economic and/or military consequences of the lie. It thus becomes vitally important for the State to use all of its powers to repress dissent, for the truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth becomes the greatest enemy of the State.”
— Dr. Joseph M. Goebbels, propaganda minister for Adolf Hitler

and finally...

“It is the duty of the patriot to protect his country from its government.”
— Thomas Paine

——

Tony Burton

My gosh, it's already the middle of November!

2006-11-12T14:57:00.000-05:00

The weather can't seem to settle on a course. Last night and today it was wet, windy and chilly... still is, in fact. Two days ago I was sweating like a pig outside, even though wearing jeans and a t-shirt.

Life is sort of like that, in fact. The unexpected will always jump up and get ya. Not long ago, I mentioned on here the anthology we just published, By the Chimney With Care. I was, and am still, very excited about this anthology, most especially because it benefits the Toys for Tots.

But today I discovered, to my horror, that one story had been inadvertently left out of the book. I won't make excuses... I'm the editor and I should have caught that. If you have purchased the book, my apologies. It's still a great book, but it's one story short! I'm in communication with the author of that story and I believe we will come to an agreement about what we will do about it very soon. Until then, enjoy the other stories.

Tony
(chagrined and embarrassed)

Ranger Day

2006-10-28T23:58:00.000-04:00

Yee-HAW!

Got to have some butt-kickin-chicken earlier tonight while listenin' to a variety of small groups playing and singing bluegrass music. Yep, I was at a small-town wingding to bring folks together and raise a little money for the community center. (Small town = population of 85 within the metropolitan limits - I kid you not!)

But there are some great people who live in and around Ranger, and I had a really good time. And I have to say, I was really pleasantly surprised. While carrying my stuff into the building (folding table, boxes of books, etc.) I was asked by a teenager if I wanted any help, and he called me "sir!" It gave me a good feeling. And AFTERWARD when I was carrying the aforementioned stuff OUT of the building, a different teenager did the same thing, also with the same amount of respect! I smiled all the way home. As a one-time high school teacher, I sometimes despair of manners in adolescents, but this was a real encouragement!

Oh, and I got to sign and sell five books. Not a lot of books, you say. Well, true, but it's five more people who will read my work and possibly buy MORE of my work. It's five more books than I would have sold sitting on my duff at home. It's at least twenty more people who came up and looked at my table, had a discussion with me, and were surprised to know that we have (1) an author locally and (2) a publishing house located in the area. I think I'll get more than five book sales from the whole thing, truthfully.

Oh, and the bluegrass! I really like good pickin'. I'm not as fond of the twangy singing, but the guitar, banjo, mandolin and bass fiddle really get me going. And I got to observe, for the very first time, an actual cakewalk. How many of you have used the expression, or have seen it: "It's not a cakewalk!" Well, I've seen the expression many times, but never the root of it until tonight.

Met a very interesting fellow, Ken Conner, who is the pastor of a local Baptist church. He has an earned doctorate, and his hobby is creating beautiful handmade knives. Gorgeous pieces, lovingly prepared. We had a nice time talking about knifemaking, his time at The Bodleian Library while on a research grant at Oxford, and then his trip down the Nile to further his research.

One more great thing: No charge for the table space, no charge for the music. $6 for the plate with a HUGE piece of barbecued chicken, baked beans, french bread, chips, drink and a slice of cake. Can't beat that, either! YUMMY.

Life and wildlife

2006-10-27T08:15:00.000-04:00

This Saturday I'll be selling and signing copies of my books Blinded By Darkness and A Wicked Good Play (I found a box of copies from the first printing in the back of a closet) at the Ranger Days celebration in Ranger, Georgia. I'll also be selling and signing copies of the anthology By the Chimney With Care, to raise money for Toys for Tots. I'll be there from 4:00 PM until at least 7:00, maybe later. Ranger is a tiny place, really, but some very fine folks live there. They recently rehabbed the old Ranger schoolhouse, and made it into a community center. They have done a fine job with it, and I'm proud to be part of the community.

Lara and I are making progress with the pump house for our well, but it started raining last night and it is still pouring, so I doubt I'll be working up there today.

While we were up there working yesterday, our dog (Buddy) surprised us. He is not a barker by habit, being half-Basenji. But at one point yesterday Lara and I heard what sounded like two large pieces of sheet metal being rubbed against each other. We looked at each other in puzzlement. We couldn't figure out if it was a dog barking or someone doing metalworking. Eventually I said, "That's a dog, and it sounds really upset!"

Now, we have coyotes in the area, as well as Ursus Americanus, or the black bear. I didn't know if it was Buddy or not, but I didn't want to think of Buddy getting eaten up by something, so I grabbed a gun from my vehicle and headed off to see what was going on. I followed the barking sound, and sure enough, it was Buddy. He was standing in the middle of a small pine thicket, trees about two inches in diameter at the most. He was looking up into the trees, occasionally jumping up to place his paws on one, obviously VERY interested in what was there.

I discovered the problem quickly enough. It was a groundhog, also known as a woodchuck. In this area of the U.S., it is also commonly called a whistlepig. Here is a picture of the little guy (or girl; I didn't get close enough to check.)

The whistlepig didn't seem all that upset by the attention it was getting. Very calm, all things considered. I stood watching him (I'm going to call it a him) for a while, and took a few pictures as you can see. He sat there ensconced in the pine branches, maybe twelve feet up in the air. He looked around, blinked occasionally, but otherwise made no sound or any indication of being perturbed. The little guy appeared to be in very good health, with lots of fat stored up for the winter. Must have weighed eight or ten pounds. Here's a close-up view:

I finally talked Buddy into leaving the whistlepig to mind its own business by making the point that his kibble at home did not bite back or have large claws. I believe he understood that, because (with a lot of longing looks over his shoulder) he reluctantly agreed to come along with me.

If you are in the Ranger area this coming weekend, I'd love to see you and sell you a book to support the Toys for Tots. I'll even sign the story I have in there for you!

Tony

Life and other stuff...

2006-10-21T12:58:00.000-04:00

Do you ever look at the calendar or clock and wonder, with a shock, where the heck the time has gone?

It's been a busy couple of weeks... but that's not new, now is it? Good busy, though.

Dear Lara (my wife) and I built a form and poured quite a bit of concrete, for the base of the pumphouse on our property. Lara is not a big lady, but I guess she's wiry—she helped me in the pouring process by hefting thirty-two 80-lb bags of concrete mix from the trailer over to near where I was working. (That's over 2500 pounds.) While she was bringing them, I was mixing them with a couple of gallons of water each, and pouring the resulting mixture into the form we had built. Add the weight of the water (8 pounds per gallon) and an extra 60-lb bag we added to finish things off, and it comes up to over 3,100 pounds of concrete we poured that day, by hand!

But enough about manual labor for the moment, although it got a little bit exciting yesterday when our Jeep was almost pushed into a ravine by a one-ton load of manure. (Don't ask...)

Anyway, the By the Chimney With Care anthology is doing well, but hey, why haven't YOU ordered your copy? This is for Toys for Tots, remember??

We have sold over 150 copies, but remember we have to pay for the printing and shipping, so that really isn't so much for the kids! We need to sell more, to make those Christmas mornings brighter for the kids. Come on, order a copy, either from me at Wolfmont Publishing or through your local bookstore or Amazon (ISBN 0-9778402-3-9). The shipping is included in the price from the publisher ($12.75 total), but the suggested retail is $10.95 without shipping.

Also, last week four of my authors (Sunny Frazier, John M. Floyd, Deborah Elliott-Upton and Frank Zafiro) and I were all participants in the Muse It Up First Annual Online Writers' Conference. Over 1,000 writers and publishers participated in this truly momentous , week-long, online event, and I believe Lea Schizas is planning on holding another one next year. If she does, and if you are a writer, want to be a writer, or want to improve your writing, you shouldn't miss it!

This past Thursday night I was the guest of the Long Ridge Writers' Group at their Thursday Night Professionals gathering, and we had a great time talking about the pleasures and pitfalls of small-press publishing, subsidy publishing, and publishing in general. The host, Mary Rosenblum, was quite gracious and everyone at the conference was eager to learn and ask questions.

Sunny Frazier and I are making definite headway on getting her debut novel, Fools Rush In, to market this winter. The ARCs have been ordered and should be here any time (crossing my fingers!)

Here's hoping you are having a wonderful October, and that All Hallows' Eve doesn't get too ghoulish for you.

Tony

Only a week, this time...

2006-10-04T11:44:00.000-04:00

It's getting better, anyway, right? (Come on... nod your head yes... there, thanks!)

A couple of things to announce:

1. The short fiction contest I ran on my ezine website has finished its course, and the winners have been announced. I'll be posting the winning stories in a day or two. Many thanks to Warner Bros. for their contribution of the prizes!

2. The crime and mystery anthology I've been working on to benefit the Toys for Tots, is ready for order! It's titled By the Chimney With Care, and has some fantastic stories in it. The coolest thing is that it was conceived and produced entirely for one purpose: to benefit the Toys for Tots. That's where the net profits will go! I'd love it if you bought a copy, or ten, for yourself or for gifts for others. Go check it out and if you'd like to feed your desire for good short fiction while helping some kids to have a brighter Christmas morning, well... You know what to do.

Thanks!

Almost a month???

2006-09-30T11:07:00.000-04:00

Egads! It's been almost a month since I've posted here, and I'm ashamed. Of course, probably the other three people who regularly read the blog are bored stiff by now, so I've got to come up with something interesting. Let's see...

Oh, OK. Recently, I was contacted by one of the marketing types at Warner Bros., and she asked me if I'd like to help with getting out the word about their new movie The Departed.

Blink, blink. Me??

Yes, me. Specifically, she (Anna, bless her heart) wanted me to use my Crime and Suspense ezine/ website to help promote the movie. So, I put together a quick writing contest on the fly, and the winners are getting t-shirts or posters from the movie. And it looks like an interesting movie, too. I know I'm going to see it. Check out the trailer at the link for The Departed.

Re-release of my first novella, with a bonus!

2006-09-08T17:04:00.000-04:00

I recently republished my first novella, after subjecting it to a round of editing and adding a couple of bonus short stories to give a bit of backstory on some of the characters in the novella. It's called Blinded By Darkness and it's a cozy mystery set in a small Southern town, and centering around some murderous attempts to stop a church from building a new sanctuary.

(And if you don't believe a church can be a dangerous place, trust me... I was a preacher's kid!)

If you would like, you can click on the linked title above and read more about it, read the first chapter, and even order a copy online!

Wow, I've been busy lately!

2006-09-07T16:26:00.000-04:00

I'm hustling to get the By The Chimney With Care anthology all ready to go, but I'm waiting on a couple of blurbs for the back cover. It's been a fun project, and the book is packed with interesting stories about crime and the winter holidays. As soon as it's available, I'll post word here.

I was invited to be part of an online writers' conference that's taking October 9-13. It's FREE, too, so that should be an attraction for anyone who is interested. I and four of my authors (Sunny Frazier, John M. Floyd, Deborah Elliott-Upton and Frank Zafiro) will all be there fielding questions on a variety of writing and publishing questions during that time. Go to http://www.freewebs.com/themuseonlinewritersconference/ to see what's on the agenda, who will be there, and to sign up.

And, I've been invited to be a guest at Long Ridge Writers' Group, an online writing school, to be interviewed and answer questions about getting into publishing. That will be on October 19, from 7:00 to 9:00 PM. Go to the web site for more details about their chat rooms and how to enter.

Exhilirating new experience!

2006-08-27T23:45:00.000-04:00

Nope, it doesn't have anything to do with writing, but at almost fifty, this is the first time I've had a dog to get sprayed by a fully-functional skunk. (I had a pet skunk once upon a time that was ALMOST descented, but that's another story.)

I was visiting my parents house, and took Buddy the World Champion Napdog along with me. Of course, he had to wander all around their property (about 22 acres) while I visited. Not long before I intended to leave, I noticed a faint skunky odor coming through the storm door screen. At first I was the only one to notice it, but then my mom smelled it, too.

I looked and there was Buddy, looking a bit shamefaced and stinking to high heaven. And I had to drive 10 miles with him in the Jeep with me!

I had no tomato juice at home, and in a very rural location, where do you find a quart or two of tomato juice at 10:30 PM?? I did find a can of V8 in the pantry, but pouring that on his head made him smell almost worse. After several washings, he's bearable, but I may try lemon juice or vinegar. (I'm guessing it's the acidity of the tomato juice that works the magic, but I don't know.)

For the Children...

2006-08-19T23:25:00.000-04:00

I have finished selecting all the stories for the Christmas charitable benefit anthology Wolfmont Publishing is putting together this year, and it's a great lineup of stories! The title is BY THE CHIMNEY WITH CARE and it contains the work of nineteen authors: one poem and seventeen stories. The book will be, when all is said and done, about 208 pages of 5x8 trade softcover delight! All the stories within it are crime stories with a Christmas theme. (Before anyone gets on my case, I also put out the word that I would accept Hanukkah, Kwanzaa and even Saturnalia stories, but no one sent one my way before the book was full.)

Oh... what? Who's in it? Let's see... Jeffrey Marks, Neil Plakcy, Rob Rosen, John M. Floyd, Tony Burton, Margaret Fenton, Suzanne Flaig, Mike Wiecek, Carol B. Cole... quite a few very good writers, with some stories that run the range from chuckle-funny to wipe-a-tear-poignant to ghostly-spooky.

The book will be available for order directly from Wolfmont Publishing (http://www.wolfmont.com). It will also be distributed through Ingram's and Baker & Taylor, and even possibly Amazon if they will reduce their cut because it's a charitable effort. When you start talking about the net proceeds going to Toys for Tots, and the distributors want such a large discount that there ARE NO net proceeds, it's sort of self-defeating to offer the book that way.

Anyway, when I have a cover shot available, I'll put one here. And when the book is available for ordering, I'll put that information here, too.

Shooting yourself in the... foot? Mouth??

2006-08-19T16:13:00.000-04:00

Recently I received a "publicity" piece from an author, and it generated as much sympathy as it did less generous emotions. I won't identify the author, out of pity and the hopes the author will learn to do a better job.

In this piece, the author proclaims "I am a self-published author, so I have to do all my own promotion."

First of all, never, ever walk into a group of publishing or book industry professionals and proudly announce "I'm self-published!" It says a few things, mostly not complimentary.

First of all, it says you probably don't know what you are talking about. True "self-publishing" means you went to R.R. Bowker and purchased the minimum ten-ISBN block, established a relationship with a printer, and paid the printer to produce your book, carrying your own ISBN. Very few people do this because of the effort, time and cost involved.

What you probably did was to go to a subsidy publisher of some kind and pay them (or to Lulu, who gets their money in more subtle ways) to publish your book with their ISBN on the back. That is not self-publishing. It's subsidy publishing, often less kindly referred to as vanity publishing. "But my publisher said I'm self-published!" you may say. Think about that statement!

Here's your best test: IF you own the ISBN and are free to take it to another printer and use it on your book there, to produce the same book with the same cover, etc., but with a different printing company, then you are self-published. If you can't take the ISBN with you when you leave the printing company, then you aren't. Simple.

OK. I said "First of all," which implies there is a "Secondly," and there is.

Secondly, as unfair as it may be, being self-published is not a badge of honor in publishing and writing circles. Generally people assume, rightly or wrongly, if you had to self-publish your book or subsidy publish it, nobody else thought it was good enough to publish commercially. This does NOT include your Mom, your Aunt Mabel who always doted on you, or anyone like that. We're talking objective readers.

I'm not saying they're right. A number of famous authors self-published, or subsidy published, or whatever you want to call it. And some of those books actually attracted positive attention once they hit the streets! But the sad truth is, most subsidy published books are pathetic things. Their cover design is often terrible. Their editing is very poor or non-existent. Their authors are often laboring under the mistaken idea that, if they write the book, people will come to them to buy it.

A few months ago, before I was exposed to so many subsidy-published books, I became indignant when someone made snide remarks about them or their authors. "Such prejudice!" I thought.

I'm going to call subsidy-published-books SPBs from now on, because I'm lazy

Now that I've tried to read and review quite a few, I understand. Seldom does an SPB come across my desk that is worthy of the time to read and review it. That's so sad! Why don't the authors believe in the idea of getting an outside editor? Heck, I'm an editor with years of experience, but when I read my OWN work, it's darn hard to see the little errors that creep in. It's because I see what I expect to see instead of what is there. It is always easier to edit someone else's work.

And the covers! I've had a couple come in for me to read, where I swear the authors commissioned a local twelve-year-old to create the cover art using crayons. That's OK for a kid's book, but it looks tacky on an action-adventure-suspense book for adults.

Yes, there is a "Thirdly."

Thirdly, it doesn't matter if you are published by yourself, by PublishAmerica, by Wolfmont Publishing or by Tor Publishing (a big name in the SciFi arena), chances are you are going to do a lot of promotion. With the number of books hitting the market now, and with limited budgets because of constraints mandated by shareholders and/or bean counters, it's the rare author who doesn't have to do the majority of promotion for his or her book. There are some big names who get money shoveled in their direction to go on book tours and so forth, but the majority of authors invest both money and "sweat equity" into the promotion of their books, hoping for a return in sales and readership.

Lastly, everybody knows you think your book is great. Hey, if you didn't, why did you publish it? Get some objective outside opinions and use quotes from those to promote your book. If you can't get any positive ones, maybe that should tell you something....

It's great if you can get authors in the same genre, but if you don't know any (bad sign there!) get other professional opinions. If it's a medical mystery, get a doctor or two to read your book and give you a quotable opinion. If it's a police procedural, get quotes from a detective or cop. Get the idea?

If you are trying to promote your book, don't do the kind of things that will turn people away from your book before they even open it up! You may actually have a decent story in there, but if people won't read the book it won't matter.

What can YOU tolerate in a book?

2006-08-16T16:15:00.000-04:00

Some people and I have been having a debate lately about what sort of things, if any, will cause people to immediately put down a book and say something like, "Oh, I just can't read that!" Now, obviously really poor writing will cause this... but wait, what about Dan Brown? Oh, never mind that example. Let's just say what sort of scene or occurence in the story will cause the reader to stop reading.
I had a survey up for a couple of days, and I was pretty amazed that it took such a short time to gather over 100 respondents. But based on feedback from the respondents, I revamped the survey and re-ran it. I didn't get as many respondents this time, but I thought the results were still interesting.

It seems that a great number of people really could not care less if a member of the clergy is killed in a story, as long as it's "off camera". But the killing of a pet cat or pet dog raised hackles all down the line!

And a great number of people objected to the killing of a small child, or the molestation of a small child. The majority of people said they would not buy and/or finish reading such a book, even if it is one they had previously decided to buy and/or read. (The scenario was that they were standing in a bookstore or library and had already decided to get this book because they had previously read one book by the author and enjoyed it. They then flipped through the book and saw the scene described in the survey question.)

Now, because my publishing company publishes short stories and novels that are about crime, I guess it's sort of incongruous that I should even worry about these things. But I really do. I believe there are ways you can write a story about a crime, be it a murder, robbery, kidnapping or even a rape, that can make the book interesting and compelling without wallowing in the gutter. And I also believe that there are some crimes that are, at least by conventional American moral standards, so heinous and horrific that the majority of people don't want to read about them.

Sure, we KNOW that pedophiles are out there, and we KNOW that people kill their own children or other people's children, and we KNOW that people torture animals in horrible ways... but do we want to read about these things? I can't answer that question for you, I can only answer it for myself.

My answer is "no".

Starting over... again

2006-08-15T23:20:00.000-04:00

I almost decided that I'd just wipe out all the previous entries because, quite frankly, it has been so loooooong since the last one that it just looked pathetic. But I kept them, and here I am, trying to make a fresh start.

Had a meeting of our local writers' group tonight, and it was a good one. Small town, so an attendance of seven is a pretty good thing! We have some experienced writers and some pretty green newbies in the bunch, but we all contribute and I think it's an enjoyable time for all.

Do you belong to a writers' group? Or a critique group? If so, is it online or "real-world"? (Boy, THAT line is blurring, isn't it?) What are the strengths of your group? How about its weaknesses?

I'll tell you what I think our biggest weaknesses are: politeness and lack of self-confidence of some members. You see, we're in the South and most of us were reared to be "nice" to people. It's hard to give an honest critique sometimes, and remain nice. Sometimes you just have to say, "Wow, you really have an ugly baby there!"

The lack of self-confidence is a killer, too. We have some members who really have some wonderful stories inside them, because they can tell them and/or write them to bring to meetings. The problem is, they shy away from submitting them to any markets.

And here's a new market for you, if you write crime or mystery stories. It's a minimally paying market, quarterly ezine, and it's called Mouth Full of Bullets.

One of my very, very FAVORITE print markets for mystery and suspense stories is Great Mystery and Suspense. (I have a short story featured in their inaugural issue, by the way!) They, too, are a quarterly publication, although they publish both hardcopy and in electronic format.

Woo-HOO! Trumpets and Flourishes!!

2006-03-12T01:58:00.000-05:00

I have a brand-spankin' new Granddaughter! My first!

Her name is Rebecca Karen Greeson, and she was born a little before midnight, Eastern time, last night (March 11). Her parents, Mark and Shanna, are very happy. Shanna (my daughter) is doing well, as is Rebecca. Mark... well, he's a new Daddy! What do you think??

Here ya go... and you, too! Virtual cigars all around! If you don't smoke, don't worry... Virtual Cigars don't stink, are not habit-forming, and absolutely non-carcinogenic!!

Tony

OK, I know... it's been a LOOONNNGGG time

2006-03-11T14:45:00.000-05:00

Yep, it's been a long time. I've been busy as a one-legged man in an... ummmm... well, in a soccer game. How's that?

The most important news first: My older daughter is having a baby sometime this month! Rebecca Karen Greeson will be the name of the little one, and this grampa-to-be is excited!

Other news: I have a story that is appearing on Reflection's Edge for the March issue. Please feel encouraged to go to http://www.reflectionsedge.com and read "Bluetick" for a shiver or two.

More news: I have a story that was accepted for the Minnesota Memories 6 anthology, to be published later this year. It is about ice-fishing on Lake Superior, and WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU DO THAT??

Finally: The anthology I have been compiling and editing, Seven By Seven, is almost ready! It is all set for an early-April release, and all the authors and I are very excited. We have sold several pre-release copies, and anticipate many more to be sold as well. The authors include BJ Bourg, Kimberly Brown, Deborah Elliott-Upton, John M. Floyd, Sunny Frazier, Gary Hoffman and Frank Zafiro. Plus, G. Miki Hayden has written a very nice foreword!

You can also see a thumbnail of the cover of the Seven By Seven anthology on http://www.wolfmont.com/wolfmont_books_sa.htm, and can save some money by purchasing your advance copy there... but only until March 15! After then, the book will go to the regular price, both for purchase and shipping. But until then you can save $1.70 by ordering at the pre-release price.

Literary Vampires

2005-12-31T15:37:00.000-05:00

I was just corresponding with an online acquaintance of mine, and saw with horror that she had been taken in by Poetry.com.

I don't know if any of you are writers, or specifically poets, but there are a number of people out there who are literary vampires, sucking the money and literary lifeblood out of people. The general scam goes like this:

(1) "Enter our writing contest for free!"

(2) You get a letter from them, that reads something like this:"Dear Patsy, I love your poem titled Poor Slob. Thank you for entering it into our free contest. It has already been moved into the semi-finals! Our joy is to discover new talent like yours..." and it goes on in a similar vein.

(3) Your poem is to be published in a GENUINE HARDBACK BOOK! But to get things like a dedication, a photograph, illustrations, biography, etc., you have to pay numerous fees. Oh, and if you WANT a copy of this astounding volume, you have to pay for it (at a premium price!)

(4) You order the book. The "publisher" now knows he has a live one on the other end, and you get a letter a few weeks later that says you are a WINNER. You are invited to come to a remote location, read your poem to hundreds, nay, THOUSANDS of admiring fans and receive a trophy or plaque of some kind. (Of course, all this costs money... the fees are as follows...)

And so it goes.

If you would like to know more about such scams, here are a FEW links:

http://windpub.com/literary.scams/index.htm http://poetrynotcom.tripod.com/ http://www.author-me.com/poetryscams.htm http://windpub.com/literary.scams/yudkin.htmhttp://www.winningwriters.com/contests/wergle/we_guidelines.php
If you have fallen prey to such an organization (as I did many moons ago, sadly), keep your hand on your wallet!

Tony Burton

Editor, Crime and Suspense ezine

http://www.crimeandsuspense.com

http://mntnview.blogspot.com

Voice Mail and Fax: (702) 543-8386

tburton@crimeandsuspense.com

See my new cozy mystery, "Blinded by Darkness". Get it in either ebook version or hardcopy at http://www.wolfmont.com

Editorial Cruelty

2005-12-25T03:44:00.000-05:00

Hmmmmm. Where does one begin? I'm the editor of an ezine, and I really enjoy that. It doesn't make me any money, but it does allow me to get to know and become friends with a lot of people I probably wouldn't otherwise know. I get to read a lot of stuff by new (and established) writers, and it's a great learning process for all concerned, I think.

But at heart I'm a gentle soul, and there are times when the editorial sword is in my hand and I have to think - "This is going to hurt!" I have a review that I have written coming up in next month's issue, where the book probably should not have been put on the street. At least, not yet. It needed heavy copyediting, proofreading, call it what you will. If this was a new publication, or I had an advance review copy in my hand I would think, "Ah, well - the bugs will get straightened out before it goes into full production." But this book has been in print for over two years!

I had a rather protracted debate about the merits of self-publishing versus the "traditional" route with some folks, and it was touched off by my offer to review self-published or small-press books on my ezine/website. I was severely taken to task by a couple of folks for "encouraging" these "talentless hacks who couldn't make it in regular publishing". I was also accused of planning to present only glowing reviews in order to make the self-published books look good. That last part really got my dander up, to use a very old phrase.

So, I made a commitment to give honest reviews. What WAS I thinking???

The first book I received for review turned out to be an editorial nightmare written by someone who attempted to imitate the hard-boiled authors of the thirties, forties and later - but only succeeded in sounding like a cheap knockoff. Unfortunately I had made my editorial bed, and now I had to try to sleep in it.

Thankfully, there are many other self-published and small-press books out there which ARE good reads, which ARE well-written and deserving of glowing reviews. Perhaps it's best, though, that my first one will not glow very much. At least, no one can accuse me of trying to falsely pump up the book.

Tony Burton
Editor, Crime and Suspense ezine
http://www.crimeandsuspense.com/

Rainy Vacations and Other Minutiae

2005-12-08T17:19:00.000-05:00

My wife and I were down at Hilton Head, SC, visiting with my wife's parents who were down from Wisconsin for a week's vacation. Unfortunately, since it is the wintertime even in sunny South Carolina, the rain was a more or less constant companion. We did have a nice time-share condo with a canal running behind it, and resident alligators. (There is a sign warning us neither to feed nor agitate these large lizards...)

We drove back into the north Georgia mountains yesterday - and it was SO nice to sleep in our own bed once more. Our dog Buddy was staying with my younger daughter, and had been pining/whining for us, so I have been led to believe, so it was good to relieve his canine anxiety as well.

I don't believe I have yet mentioned that I am the editor of an ezine, Crime and Suspense. The link will take you to the home page for the ezine, where you can sign up for the monthly issues that are sent out (FREE) via email. We have some great writers who contribute to the ezine, both new and established authors, experienced and green-as-grass. We also have reviews of published novels and anthologies, writers' helps and a lot of other cool stuff. The December issue has stories by yours truly, Diane Dahlstrom, Gay Kinman, Deanne Boast, Sunny Frazier and Rashid Raza. I'd love to have you come by and visit, and even subscribe. (As I said, it's free.)

I read today where they had arrested some ecoterrorists who had (among many other things)destroyed a plywood and veneer plant back in 2001. The story said there were about 1,200 ecoterror attacks attributed to these two groups: the Earth Liberation Front (ELF) and the Animal Liberation Front (ALF).

OK, I have to admit it: I drive an SUV. But where and how I live, it's basically a necessity. Other than that, I like to think I am relatively eco-conscious. I recycle cans, bottle, paper and plastic. I limit my trips to town. I buy recycled where possible. So, I feel like a pretty good citizen of the Earth.

But eco-terrorism really gets my back up. As good as the intentions may be, terrorism is not the answer. Education, yes... public protests, yes... even annoying and bothersome things like dumping sludge onto a conference table can be of value. But burning down a plywood and veneer plant, or destroying a power transmission tower - come on, these are acts of TRUE terror, that could destroy lives, and accomplish little else except to mark as extremists all those who would work for peaceful resolution of these issues.

The hypocrisy of such people really gets to me. It's not like there is a large group of people in the United States, or even in the world, who live totally without leaving a footprint on the ecology. Whether you are a suburbanite who commutes to work, or an aborigine who hunts for food, you change the ecology around you. Here's a kicker, too: these two groups, the ELF and the ALF, have websites where they communicate about their causes. Well, gee, folks! The electricity for running all the various parts of the Internet comes from a variety of sources, many of them NON-eco-friendly. Many of the parts for computers are plastic - and NOT recycled plastic - made from petroleum products. And so on. Anyone who is using computers and the Internet to communicate is also having a negative impact on the environment. It's all a matter of degrees, and how much one is willing to compromise.

Stalking the Wily Mistletoe

2005-11-25T19:20:00.000-05:00

It's the time of year when those of us with a traditional leaning (at least in the Southern U.S.) go out and gather the necessary accompaniments to the celebration of the holidays: a Christmas tree, evergreen branches, holly, and mistletoe.

My wife is from Wisconsin, bless her heart. Last year was her first time to live out the entire gamut of the seasons in a Southern clime, and she reveled in it. When Christmas time came near, I told her of the necessity of going out and gathering mistletoe. (I had been pointing out to her the clumps growing high in the oaks and sycamore, ever since the leaves had fallen enough to make the mistletoe visible.)

She looked at me with surprise. "How do you get it?" she asked me. "Those branches look too thin to climb out onto!"

"You shoot it down," I replied. To which serious answer she laughed and refused to believe me. I told her to confirm it by asking someone else. So the next time we were at my parents' house, she turned to my father and asked, "Charlie, how do you get mistletoe?"

He promply replied, "You shoot it down." Her lower jaw dropped and I grinned. She had equated "mistletoe shooting" with "snipe hunting", I believe - a mythical occupation used to confound and trick the unwary.

The following weekend we went to my Aunt Jewel's home in a nearby pastoral community and took shotguns and small-caliber rifles with us. We took careful aim and brought down several trophy branches of mistletoe, while my wife mostly shook her head at the doings of the strange Southerners. I finally convinced her to take a shot, but she only managed to bag a few small twigs.

Anyway, this year she began talking about the "Annual Mistletoe Hunt" a couple of weeks ago, and today we went to another location to fetch home the high-dwelling plant. We managed to collect two grocery bags of it, and much of it is going to be shipped home to her relatives in Wisconsin, who had never heard of such an event. To quote my wife, "The only time I had ever seen mistletoe was hanging in a little cellophane bag, next to the cashier at the store." They didn't believe her last year, until she sent them several photos of the mighty mistletoe hunters, bringing down their prey.

And as you can see, it works - even if it isn't cut down by Druids wielding golden sickles.

The Abundance of Rain

2005-11-21T13:20:00.000-05:00

This past summer and early fall have been mostly very dry. I suppose this is true across much of the Southern Appalachians and the Cumberland Mountains, because everyone I know says the leaf-peeper season is suffering greatly. The dry weeks have caused the leaves to turn brown prematurely, instead of passing through their normal lovely red, gold and bronze phases. I know it has been that way here.

My wife and I are trying very hard to cover some bulldozer-ravaged soil that the previous owner of the land created, and for a quick fix we have planted winter rye down a long, sloping draw that has tremendous potential for erosion if something doesn't hold the soil in place. My wife has also spent many hours tediously hand-planting English ivy on the upper hillside above our driveway, to inhibit erosion there while providing a more scenic view than the Japanese honeysuckle gives to it.

We have worried much about the dryness of the soil, but had confidence (faith??) that the rains would come eventually. Well, they have.

The last two, almost three, days have been rain, rain and yes, some more rain. I really like the rain. Some of my most pleasant sleeping is spent with soft Celtic music playing in the background, while the raindrops beat out an accompanying syncopated rhythm on the roof and windows. Problematically, when the rain continues all day long, I always seem to be sleepy.

My caffeine intake has increased dramatically in the last couple of days. It's either that or fall asleep over my keyboard.

Corporate greed and the human condition

2005-11-19T01:56:00.000-05:00

A few years ago, my mother had an accident at the WalMart where she worked as the Personnel Officer. She was coming down some stairs, and someone had spilled oil on the steps, then attempted to clean the oil with a wet mop. My mother hit the oil-and-water-slickened painted concrete steps, and fell down the stairs, injuring her back, arm, and hip. She became permanently disabled, in constant pain. She has had numerous surgeries and torturous treatments to try to fix this problem, but nothing works, and according to the doctors, nothing will ever work. She will be in pain, or doped up, for the rest of her life.

Now, stuff happens. That's the way life is. My parents are not strangers to suffering, having lost one adult child to a car accident, and almost losing another (me) to a car accident when I was four years old. Their house burned down when I was four, too. Life hasn't been kind, but they are survivors.

But WalMart - the Corporate Great Satan - has been doing nothing but trying to stop her disability payments for years, ever since the accident. The latest episode has them taking my parents to court to stop payments to her, medical care payments, and payments to my father for providing full-time care, because she has reached the age of 65.

My mother and father had their lives irrevocably altered by this incident which disabled my mother. She was always a lively, dynamic, hard-working woman. She loved walking in the fields beside their home, working in her flower beds, playing with her grandchildren. But all of that changed in an instant.

Now, she must take pain medication every day. She has a very sensitive system, so the kinds of medication she can tolerate are limited. She has to take special sleeping medication because the pain medication causes her to have nightmares. Her memory is fading - she will often repeat herself many times when telling things, because the medication simply causes her to forget. She has a special lift chair now. She can't sit for more than about thirty minutes at a time without getting up and walking around to relieve the pain, yet walking for very long causes her agony, too. She has had over fifty epidural spinal injections over the last six years, when doctors recommend that the safe level of such injections is no more than two per year.

Her nerves have been affected by the pain medication, the surgery and the implanting of a neural stimulating device in her spine to combat the pain, so that now she cannot bear a loud noise without being reduced to a quivering mass. They had to buy a special vehicle, expensive, to carry her motorized wheelchair around. The motorhome they had purchased before sits mostly unused, because the trips they had planned on after retirement are too much of a strain on both her physical condition and their modest income.

I am NOT recounting all the suffering, all the sleepless nights, all the tears, all the pain, all the craziness that my father and mother have had to endure because of this - the endless rounds of questioning at hearings until my mother broke down in tears. I am, as it were, only hitting the lowlights.

Now, the wheedling, supercilious, $250 per hour %@#*&!! lawyers who work for WalMart want to try to take away my parents support and stop paying for her constant medical care. Is this a great country or what???

Adventures in forestry

2005-11-16T23:34:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago, my wife and I finally got the time and inclination concurrently to do something that has needed doing for quite some time: clear out some trees on our property that are either in the way or present a danger. There was one that was dead but still sound, and there were two rotten ones.

After having a fair amount of ease with these (my wife didn't have any idea of my expertise with a chainsaw, I suppose!), we decided to go up onto the bluff right behind our house and take down some small ones that were growing right on the edge.

I did the proper things, you know. For instance, I tied a guide rope to the tree, and ran it around another tree, so my wife could pull on the rope without being in danger of the tree falling toward her. I notched the tree deeply in the exact direction I wanted it to fall. I then started cutting on the other side of the tree trunk.

When I was almost through the tree, it began to creak and fall. The problem was, it wasn't doing what it was supposed to do!! Instead of falling in the direction of the notch, and the direction of the guide rope, it was falling right toward my wife!

Remember, this tree was right on the edge of a little bluff. I looked up. I saw it falling in the wrong direction. My mind didn't register that the tree was falling at an extremely slow speed. I shouted, quickly stood upright... and stepped right over the edge of the bluff, with a running chainsaw in my hand.

(Here is where you are supposed to go "Oh my God!" and clap your hand over your mouth or something like that.)

I feel about 5 feet and bounced off the wall of the bluff, using my shoulder and elbow as a pivot point. Then I fell another five feet onto my buttocks, and rolled over into a position on my knees... with the still running chainsaw held as far away from my body as possible!

The thought running through my mind as I fell? Well, it honestly was, "Oh, good grief, I'm going to fall on the raspberries!" We had planted raspberries on that slope, and I didn't want to crush them, I guess. I missed hitting an upright, 2-foot-tall wooden stake by about six inches.

Lara came running over to the edge of the bluff, unharmed by the falling tree, and looked down in horror. I was on my knees, with my hands outstretched, saying, "I'm OK, I'm OK!"

Suffice to say, I was very sore that night, and for a couple of days afterward. I lost some skin on my right elbow, and still have some residual soreness, but other than that I'm in remarkably good shape for what happened.

I really gave Lara, and I suppose my guardian angel, quite a fright. Thankfully they were both on the job.

Looking up at the mountain

2005-11-14T00:37:00.000-05:00

Well, here I am, a basically unemployed consultant who really wants to be a writer. What is basically unemployed? Well, basically, I'm unemployed. I became tired of being away from home on these 8-10 week assignments, working at stuff I really hate even though I'm very good at it. I asked my employer (who shall remain nameless, and often clueless) for assignments that were closer to home, or shorter in duration.

They don't exist, apparently. So we had a parting of the ways. I'm at that point in my life where I have realized that making the most possible money isn't the best use of my time. My wife and I met late in life, so we already don't have as much time to spend together, by default. I have no desire to lose more of those 0h-so-precious days while I'm still fit enough and sane enough to enjoy them.

Ergo, my wonderful wife is being very supportive at my attempt to do full-time what I have only tried to do on a part-time basis before now: write. And believe me, if you have not tried to make a living as a writer, you have no idea how much looking up at the mountain you do. There's a lot of walking uphill.

On a more positive and real-world note, we recently bought property that includes a small mountain (OK, a glorified hill, but gimme a break here!) The view from there is fantastic - I can literally see into two other counties at least, and when the rest of the leaves fall from the trees, possibly into three! We are planning a new house on the highest point of the property, with a nice observation deck on the second story to make the view even better. My lack of employment makes it much slower to accomplish, true, but we have a very solid and wonderful dream.

We have pitched a tent on that highest point, and have taken lawn furniture up there. So, when we get discouraged about our dreams, we walk up the mountain and sit there. We look at the geese flying overhead, at the view of the rolling hills covered with trees that go into the distance. We sit there at night and watch the stars dance overhead. Sometimes, we lie there on our backs on a blanket, looking up at the sky and trying to fathom the mind of God.

There must be a reason the ancients built their temples and groves of worship on the high places.